[It looks like Toasty's still down with the Soo Flu and a new, very not festive Star Wars show ate up my December 3rd extracurricular time so we're already a day behind in opening up the Advent. I'll try to double dose it today, and hopefully Toasty's getting some rest (and maybe some Hallmarkie watching in) in time to return.]
Finding Mr. Christmas - Hallmark Channel/W Network (5/10 episodes watched)
The Men:
Parker - he's a model and dad and husband. 40. Looks like handsomer Andy Samberg.
Jonathan - competed in college level track and field. Handsome, dimples, seems young.
Isaac - firefighter. Child of 8. 28. Not a lot going on...
Gage - theatre major. Great hair. 29. Conceited as fuck.
Daxton - the gay. And a ginger. Energetic. He's never too much and always enough.
Elijah - acts sings and raps. Oh and was in the touring cast of Hamilton for 5 years. He was in Hamilton!
David - the Canadian. Aerospace Engineer. Out of his depth. Soooper awkward.
Hayden - the Australian. Children's entertainer. Lost his dog in the divorce. Cries out them pretty blue eyes.
Blake - the cowboy. Salesman. Charming as fuck.
Ezra - Was in the navy. Model. Tall, stacked, very good looking but with a child-like sense of awe and wonder.
(The Great): The best part of a show like this (and by this, I mean, a show that really has no reason to exist... I mean using a reality show to find the lead role of a movie but without really putting these men through any acting training or performing on camera boot camp, well it's nonsense) is meeting the men and making snap judgements about them. So much of these shows are formed in the editing, and, man, if this is the best material we get with these guys, the scenes in between must have been rough stuff. As much as some of these guys are used to being in front of a camera, talking on camera and improv is none of their fortes. There's a delightful cringe in the opening couple episodes as these men are asked to make small talk with each other, and asked to do their "testimonials" and the nonsense phrases that come out of their mouths are such a delight. And then, making one's bets about who's the immediate front-runner (Parker), and then changing those opinions from challenge-to-challenge, well, that's the draw of reality competition shows, right?
(The Good) Some of these guys ... wow, they just don't have it. And some of them might have too much of it. Watching these guys try and act, or improv, or go through challenges, and fail, in some cases pretty spectacularly is such fun. Gage is a self-aggrandizing, arrogant, egocentric and never fails to exhibit those qualities, at least in the edit. So when there's a scene challenge, where the men perform a scene with a Hallmark leading lady, Gage nails the scene, but... along with the scene, the show sets us a compassion challenge with a skater falling over on the ice, and all the other guys help her up. Not Gage though... he stops short of pointing and laughing, but he makes a crack and makes it about himself, and doesn't help her up. Jesus. And then in a modelling elimination challenge, David...well... just... woof. Awkward. Hilariously, cringey and aaaawkward.
(The Bad) The show is broken up into three parts. The show ends with the judging and one of the men taking down their stockings from the fireplace mantle. The judging is based on the "Star Quality Challenge" which is an acting or performing or "looking pretty" challenge, which at least have some grounding in helping determining if the contestant has the goods. But to start each episode there's the "Festive Faceoff", a completely stupid garbage challenge where the men are put through some inane task, like an obstacle course, or decorating a Christmas sweater, or wrapping presents, you know, things that are so very important to acting on camera. It's filler shit, put in place primarily because it's formulae for these shows, not because it makes any sense for judging the contestants for the contest at hand. It's hard to root for any of these guys in these challenges because they're pretty fucking meaningless, and do next to nothing to help the audience decide who they would want to see in a Hallmark movie. They're kind of demeaning if anything.
META: I was originally going to write about this when it was all over but then I realized that it wasn't over until Christmas and there's no Advent Calendar on Christmas. Plus, as noted, there's gaps to fill, so talking about it now. We're invested, somewhat (it's a ridiculous fucking show, but it makes us laugh), so we will be seeing through to the end.
We were really rooting for Parker from the onset, but buy Episode 5 we were like... get him out of here. At the mid-way point, I'm thinking it's either going to be Hayden or Elijah. Elijah (he was in fucking Hamilton for 5 years!) is the best performer...maybe too talented, but Hayden has the Hallmark leading man vibe.
We were introduced to the idea that this isn't an actual competition show, that Hallmark had already hired its leading man, and it's just using this as a ratings vehicle and gimmick. But that made more sense when we thought Parker was the guy. But clearly Parker was not the guy. I dunno, we'll need to see how that movie turns out.
You mixed up Elijah and Isaac in the 'who should win' paragraph; Elijah was in Hamilton for 5 years.
ReplyDeleteIt really should be Elijah that wins, but I'm starting to think it might be Blake. Of course, we thought it would be Parker and we were completely wrong about that, so...
I'm bad at names and getting old and getting confused easily and was writing quickly without editing and also exhausted from a long day/weeks/months at work....
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