Xmas Leftovers: Genie

2023, Sam Boyd (In a Relationship) -- Amazon

I know we don't like Melissa McCarthy very much but its written by Richard Curtis, who also wrote the original Bernard and the Genie, which we loved. So, how bad can it be?

Yeah, that bad. Not entirely bad, but definitely Melissa McCarthy bad.

Bernard Bottle (Paapa Essiedu, The Lazarus Project) is a meek man working for a Dick Boss at an art auction house. On a fateful night, he is rushing out the door to attend his daughter's birthday skating party when said Boss interrupts him for a walkthrough of a catalogue with a client. The walkthrough doesn't go well, Bernard misses the party and loses the gift he had for his daughter, opting instead for some random tchochke he finds in his apartment. In the choice of MacGuffin, I am not sure why they chose a jewelry box, or why he had it in the first place, or why he wouldn't think it wasn't the item he had sitting on his bookcase a few hours prior, but no matter, hand-wave, its the genie "bottle" we were expecting. But Bernard's latest fumble is enough, and his wife leaves him with their daughter.

Bernard then rubs the jewelry box, for some reason, and out comes the misty purple smoke that coalesces into Flora, the genie. Flora claims she is cursed, claims she is celtic (flashback scene has her looking like an extra from Braveheart) and claims she is around two thousand years old. It doesn't explain why a curse would give her unlimited power, or why she would be dressed in Arabian garb or why she was around the Middle East when Jesus was alive (not sure if that was pre or post curse) but whatever, amusing comments that are not meant to make sense. Either way, she's now a genie who can provide Bernard with unlimited wishes.

What follows is a somewhat charming movie interrupted by fish-out-of-water antics from Melissa McCarthy. Its all about Bernard restructuring his life, given the magical resources he now has, to better suit one for his wife & child. He is also teaching Flora about modern times and dealing with wish related hijinx that rarely have any consequence beyond minor inconvenience. This is not your "wishes are dark tricks" movie, and its mild attempt at conflict is relegated to him being mistaken for stealing the Mona Lisa. Why two random cops seeing a painting on the wall of his apartment would assume its the real missing painting and not some cheap print is beyond me, but whatever, the police arrest him, assuming he is some brilliant mastermind. That is, until Flora undoes it and they look like idiots.

There is some warmth that emerges here and there, mainly because Bernard is a genuinely a nice guy, despite being utterly clueless about time and boundaries. If there was ever a misplaced lesson to be learned here, it is that people can fix whatever is wrong with their life as long as they are provided unlimited resources. I am  up to testing that lesson, if there happens to be a genie nearby.

Of course, for me, most of the movie was marred by McCarthy. Her usual style of humour felt out of place and often needlessly crass. She's a genie afterall, and could have provided herself with the knowledge she needed to be aware of current times. But nope, instead we have her acting all sorts of weird for the sake of being colourful. And weird.