Showing posts with label roadtrip. Show all posts
Showing posts with label roadtrip. Show all posts

Tuesday, October 6, 2026

31 Days of Halloween: It Ends

2025, Alexander Ullom (feature premiere) -- download

Sorry about the last post. Google has decided I said something "adult" and has hidden it behind a "you have to sign in" link. They won't tell me what I said -- after 15 years of writing here, its not like I am saying something suddenly disruptive, but I have an idea. But anywayz, the movie was about gangs of LA, bad cops and vampires.

The first challenge with this movie was getting over the Gen Z protagonists, all of an age where they have been going to college and are about to, or have just entered "real life". They are obviously all life-long friends, but... wow, are they insufferable with each other, almost intolerable. Maybe being horrible to each other was their schtick? In most movies this would end up leading to reveals of deep seated historical resentments and betrayal, but no, this is just who they are. 

So, unlike most "road horror movies", we don't start with the overhead shot of nothing but trees and a car's headlights breaking the gloom. We get a brief glimpse from the forest floor, looking upwards, but then we are just in the car, the kids (and to me, at my age, they are kids) heading out to... we don't know; all we know is that its the first right and just up the road. But as soon as they make the right, dusk becoming night, they notice there hasn't been a turn off for a while, and the GPS on their phone just says "go straight." Eventually they, but mainly the aggressive driver Tyler, agree to do a U-turn and head back. Except, it ends. They way they came in has become the impassable forest.

And that's the premise of the movie. The road has mysteriously become all that there is. Tossing traditional horror movie structure to the wind, it becomes more scifi, more existential dread, more psychological terror, than anything else.

So, Tyler (Mitchell Cole, Against the Spread), Fish(er) (Noah Toth, Unfix), James (Phinehas Yoon, Smoking Tigers) and Day (Akira Jackson, Against the Spread) are the kids. Two of them are in / just finishing college. James has entered the ratrace, and Tyler joined the military but has never deployed. They are together for the first time in a while, to ... help one move? The ambiguity of their gathering is a very intentional technique, which becomes highlighted as the movie goes on, as time passes, as they begin to forget life before the road. 

So yeah, there is the road, and its structure, and its elements. At the beginning of the trip, after noticing there are no turn offs, and turning back to The End / The Beginning, they discover the woods are full of people - screaming, yelling, grabbing, clawing people who are desperate to get into the car. "Help me!!!" they cry out. The friends never ask what is going on, of the strangers, just panic and drive away, Fish has been clawed-at and injured, the rest just freaked out. They drive. Eventually night becomes dawn becomes day. They stop. After about 1 minute 30, the people come screaming from the woods again.

Each of them reacts differently to the situation. James is calm, unemotional and trying to put together reasons from what's going on. Fish is having panic attacks. Tyler is aggressive and angry. Day just tries to be diplomatic. They eventually notice that the gas isn't going below a quarter tank, and they don't have any need for bodily functions, and they don't get tired or need to / can sleep. A few things change, or new things happen, the longer they drive: fewer people, and then, abandoned cars, and finally other people who abandoned those cars, and just ... gave up, lying on the side of the road, alive but unresponsive. But mostly it is the same, for a very very long time.

And that's it. That's the movie. The driving, the friends, the conflict, the ideas, the time, the talking and the talking and the talking, the talking to survive madness, the talking to distract, the talking because what else is there to do. There are no explanations, and that becomes apparent, despite James believing he can figure it out given enough road. The metaphors for what is going on are numerous, and despite being the filmmakers intent, as someone much older than him, I don't suffer from not knowing what is coming next. I know what is next -- more of the same. And, well that's pretty heavily an element of the movie too. 

Movies without resolutions can be maddening. The "ending explained" posts are probably having a field day with this movie, and I suspect they will all get it wrong. I rather liked the movie, but maybe because I am rather intimate with existential dread these days, it just felt comfortable. And once they were settled into what they were suffering, I had more sympathy for the kids.

Monday, March 11, 2024

KWIF: Madame Web (+4)

 KWIF = Kent's Week (or two) In Film. It would probably be easier on me if I just did as Toasty does and write-up each film as an individual post, but I seem to prefer just sitting down for three (or four or more) hours and plugging away at writing about movies when I'm awake way too early.  We're encroaching on 2000 published posts here at T&K Sometimes Disagree, and had I separated each movie or TV show into their own entry we'd probably be closer to 2500. Whatevs. Still it's quite a milestone.

This Week: 
Madame Web (2024, d. S.J. Clarkson - In Theatre)
All Of Us Strangers (2023, d. Andrew Haigh - Disney+)
Joy Ride (2023, d. Adele Lim - Crave)
No Hard Feelings (2023, d. Gene Stupnitsky - Crave)
Akilla's Escape (2020, d. Charles Officer - Crave)

---

Of all the films I have to write about this week, Madame Web is certainly the least of them. It only gets the KWIF headline spotlight because it's the first 2024 film I've seen this year. I'm still catching up on 2023.

We all knew, from the first trailer, that Madame Web was going to be trash. The trailer hid nothing, and the complete disinterest of the cast was evident in a 2 minute montage. 

Some of us even knew back when Sony announced they were producing a Madame Web movie that it was going to be trash. There's never even been a Madame Web solo comic book, how are you going to make a whole movie around that character? Especially when, in the comics, she's a blind, chair-bound eeeellllderly woman. As an actress Dakota Johnson is not a lot of things, and those are three of them.

The most interesting thing about Madame Web is all metatext, the stuff that happened around it. If the reports are true, it started out as a 90's-set prequel to the Andrew Garfield-led Amazing Spider-Man franchise. Then, apparently, producers got cold feet and wanted to push it up a decade and make it a prequel to the Tom Holland-led Spider-Man: Home* franchise. Then they got complete frostbite, lost their toes, and decided to make it its own thing.

It's certainly it's own thing.

We all knew it was going to be a bad movie. Upon its release critics were savage, comic book movie fans even more so, but even still, when I suggested Toasty and I spend an entire Saturday watching at least 4 screenings of Madame Web, I was only half joking.

Why?

Because Madame Web is truly a film that should not logically exist. There's no audience asking for it, there's no fanbase for the character, and there's no "world building" impetus for it. It was a studio-mandated dumpster fire the purple suits hoped would turn into a barbecue.  And that's intriguing to me.  

It's not like Morbius -- which I skipped and had zero interest in seeing until it cropped up on Netflix this week and now it's on the "wee hours of the morning, maybe" pile -- who is a character and concept, much like Blade which has the potential to be its own thing. He has had his own comic book series at least. But Morbius seemed too self-serious, as any Jared Leto-led project does. Madame Web looked like there was potential for a good time.

And you know what...?

I had a good time.

It is a terrible movie, just bloody ridiculous. A ludicrous farce of a superhero origin story that never fails to boggle the mind with inept story transitions and character choices and expository dialogue. But in that, it felt kind of light, breezy, mindless. It's sort of like getting that glaucoma test at the optometrist, where you sit there in dreaded anticipation of that puff of wind going in your eye, and then it happens and you can't help but be surprised and react and laugh, and then, really forget all about it seconds after its over. This is just a puff of wind in the eyes.

I don't have a lot of experience with Johnson's prior roles, and what I have seen has not left me clamouring for more. Her performance, if you can call it that, reeks of embarrassment. You can totally tell she doesn't really want to be in this movie. I have seen Adam Scott -- who plays (Uncle) Ben Parker here -- in plenty of things, dramatic and comedic, and I have never seen him not even phone in the performance, he's still dialing the numbers here. The whole cast is lifeless and drained of any energy. It probably speaks to all the many reshoots done, but it's a listless product, save for one aspect that actually does work: women talking.

The life of this film is when all the female characters are on screen together. There's a support there that seems to elevate the dodgiest script, and a true sense of bonding between the performers seemed to have happened... like soldiers in a regimen at war, experiencing the same traumas brings you close.

That good time I had watching this, though, I think it's a one shot deal. I can't imagine rewatching it and getting the same sense of enjoyment. It's a real dog of a Spider-person movie.

With a re-edit and more reshoots, I could see a much better, completely Marvel-free horror movie made out of this, of a woman whose precognitive powers isolate her from society and the three girls she must save from a slasher who is killing orphans or something. 

Will Madame Web become a cult film, though? I could see people coming to screenings, holding pepsi cans and fake spiders in jars and doing fake chest compressions (the cure for everything) in the aisles.

---

All Of Us Strangers was a critical top-ten favourite of 2023 but missed out on the Oscars likely because Searchlight Pictures was putting its money behind nominations for Poor Things instead.  It's loosely adapted from Taichi Yamada's novel Strangers into a definite tone poem (and not a vibes movie).

Andrew Scott plays Adam (no, he's not playing Adam Scott of Madame Web...we've moved on...) is a screenwriter in London. He lives in a new condo tower that is largely vacant. He seems lonely and a little depressed. He encounters a drunk Harry (Paul Mescal, completely endearing), who seems very much in the same state, but rebuffs Harry's offer for company to retreat into solitude. 

Adam is trying to write about his parents, who died in a car crash when he was 12, but can't find the words, so he returns to his childhood home, where he encounters their ghosts. They catch up on their son's life. Adam is elated. He runs into Harry again and the two connect, first as two lonely and sad people, but then as two gay men whose lives just need more love and affection in them.

Adam and Harry become a fast couple, a very sweet, tender, romantic, caring couple, and together they venture out of their solitude and into the world. Adam, meanwhile, returns to his ghost parents on multiple occasions, some encounters not faring as well as others (like when he outs himself to his mother), but finding closure along the way.

Tone poems (like vibes movies) can be a challenge. I found myself a little bored during the first act, but when Adam and Harry finally connect, and get intimate, it's quite passionate. The second act, as Adam and Harry become more emotionally involved the colour palette gets really warm, and the bare skin of the men is just radiant. It reminds me just a touch of In the Mood for Love. The second act really endears you to these men and their gentle, supportive relationship. The vibestones leave no room for drama, there's not going to be any wild swings...except Adam's return visits to his parents' ghosts. 

At times, I had to ask myself, is this a romance or a horror? A drama or a ghost story? The answer is "yes", and it's hard to reconcile at times. The third act is a tearjerker and, I'm sure for many (like Lady Kent), a head scratcher. At one point I was telling myself "if the movie goes there, I'm going to be so very mad at it." The movie went there. I wasn't mad, because it found itself, seconds later, right back in the vibestones, and it kept vibingtoning, and I kept vibingtoning with it.

It won't be for everyone, as vibe movies are pretty much  exclusive to those who hit the same wavelength. I can see this emotionally connecting very hard with people who lost their parents young, or who have had strained relationships with them because of their gender or sexuality (or both) but, even if you can't personally relate, it offers a space on the couch, a little hit of something, and a set of headphones to feel the groove...if you accept it.

---

I had planned to catch up on a bunch of 2023 comedies this week but only managed two, which is fine. More than any other genre, comedies are the ones I approach with the most trepidation. What the proverbial Purple Suits think the masses think is funny and what I think is funny tend to be two radically different things.

Joy Ride is like half a Purple Suits-derived movie, and half spitting directly in their faces. The road-trip-gone-wild (RTGW) subgenre of comedy is such a Purple Suits formulae at this point that it's an instant eye-roll generator for me. The RTGW in recent years, though, has been co-opted from the Purple Suits by the FUBU crowd and we're seeing culturally-specific RTGW movies hitting the screens and turning tidy profits. 

In this case, it finds two lifelong best friends, both Asian-American, but borne of different circumstances.  Audrey was adopted from China as a baby to white parents, while Lolo was raised by her immigrant parents, and they met as children in the very white, Dave Matthews Band-soaked community of White Hills. Now adults, Audrey is the consummate overachiever, handling microagressions from her ignorant-not-intolerant white lawyer colleagues as she climbs to the top, while Lolo is a sex-positive artist with little income living in Audrey's basement. Audrey is set to take a trip to Shanghai to close a business deal and is taking Lolo with her as translator, since Audrey never really learned to speak Mandarin. In China they're to meet up with Audrey's college roommate, Kat, who has become a famous soap opera actress about to make the leap into major feature films. Lolo's awkward cousin, Deadeye, tags along as she's supposed to meet up with some online friends from a K-Pop superfan forum. 

Audrey's experience in China at first is a mixed bag. Being surrounded by people who look like her lends her a quiet comfort that she never knew, but then finds that the language barrier, and the cultural barrier dampen that comfort. Lolo wants her to look up her birthmother while they are there, but Audrey seems to have no interest, until the business deal goes sour and proving her Chinese bona-fides to the Chinese investor involves recruiting her birth mom into action or losing everything she's worked for.

Of course nothing turns out right and the four women find themselves on a road trip gone very wrong that involves heavy amounts of drugs, aggressively sexy times with a basketball team, some distant relative connections, a breakdown in the friendships and an unexpected turn in Audrey's priorities.

I find the RTGW genre a fairly tired one, particularly the requisite "we're so high on drugs" scene and/or the absurd sex-stuff scene(s), because they're so often just relying upon the conceit for the laugh and not really working hard to elevate the jokes. The drug stuff here is so much the former, but the sex scenes with the basketball team leads to a pretty good group of gags, even if it's cartoonishly out of hand.

Our leads  -- Ashley Park (Emily In Paris) as Audrey, Sherry Cola (Shortcomings) as Lolo, Stephanie Hsu (Everything Everywhere All At Once) as Kat and Sabrina Wu in a very breakout performance as Deadeye -- are all terrific, the chemistry is great, and they're all nimble comedic performers. Park nails the third-act drama so well, she had me tearing up along with her.  

There is a place for comedy-for-the-masses, but to me, the best comedy gets deeply specific. What will always take a general 3-star RTGW story up a level is cultural specificity, it's the jokes that are generated from the culture by the culture to appeal to the culture. I'm not sure the jokes here are deeply specific, but they are definitely specific, and, even though it's not a comedy playing to me directly as an audience, it's still a rowdy fun time overall.

---

I think film trailers are the number one reason why people don't go see comedies in the theatres anymore.  It's hard enough to get a comedy that swerves around the Purple Suits' expectations for what's funny, but then you got the Purple Suits' editors distilling a film down to two minutes and their particular sensibilites.

Thus No Hard Feelings trailer premiered to a swath of reactionary, unfounded "film about grooming" allegations that I'm not sure it ever properly shook. From my perspective it looked like a stupid "raunchy comedy" that certainly couldn't have anything interesting to say about an older woman trying to bring a teenager out of his shell for a new car.

The teenager in question is 19-year-old Percy who is about to head out to Princeton in the fall, but never leaves his room and worries his parents with his isolationism. As a parent of modern teens, I can relate. But these rich second-home-having New York elite types are also aggressive helicopter parents and they aim to do something about it. They solicit an ad for a college-aged woman to date their son in exchange for a new car.

Answering the ad is Maddie, a 32-year-old Montauk lifer is struggling to keep her house. Her car has been repossessed, which means she can't supplement her low-wage bartending job with Uber driving for the summer when all the rich idiots descend upon town. It's these idiots, buying up and redeveloping all the real estate, that is driving her taxes up to unaffordable levels.  She needs the car to drive the idiots to save her house, and she's willing to date a 19 year old to do it.

What results initially is highly awkward, very uncomfortable scenes of Maddie trying to get Percy's attention, trying to proposition him, trying to get him interested in having sex with her. Her plan is to get in and get out because time is money and time is a-wasting.  But Percy is a thoughtful, sensitive and caring kid. He finds Maddie attractive but he wants to get to know her before he does anything with her.

What happens, naturally, is Maddie develops feelings. Percy's not like the quick meaningless lays she's left around town, she has a genuine interest in Percy's development as a person, seeing a reflection of her own life lost by the promise of this fledgling adult. Of course, her feelings are not romantic, like Percy's start to become towards her, and there's not really any easy way out of this, especially if he were to find out about the deal.

Jennifer Lawrence is a fearless performer. She doesn't carry with her any sense of ego or identity in her performance. It's only the first few minutes of the movie where I was thinking "yeah sure, world-famous movie star Jennifer Lawrence is pretending to be a victim of the housing crisis and class inequality" to "Maddie really needs that car, and while her tactics are riotously wrong-headed, she's not wrong for going for it". The brassiness that Lawrence shows as Maddie is a very well constructed veil that is evident from the beginning, hiding someone underneath who is sort of lost and afraid, and has been for a long time. (There's pretty much a direct parallel between Maddie and Adam from All Of Us Strangers, both who lost their parents young, and both who have severe difficulty opening up to others with knotted up hearts).

Matching her scene-for-scene is Andrew Barth Feldman, a newcomer to the screen but played the lead in Dear Evan Hanson on Broadway. The kid's got chops. The film is set in this age of financial disparity, and offers no resolution to it, save for the poor to take advantage of the inane ways the rich wish to be served. But it's also about the generation gap, between the time Percy's parents remember (eg. the John Hughes years) and the way kids engage with the world today, and also in the way Maddie views the world compared to Percy.  It's not directly saying a lot about these things, but they're being put boldly up on the screen to examine and compare.

It's a far more thoughtful film than I had given it credit for, and it doesn't go for easy gags. Even it's most infamous (already) scene finds Lawrence engaging in fighting a trio of teenagers fully naked at night on the beach, at one point even suplexing a kid. In a comedy 20 years ago it would have been cheap titillation but, it's definitely not that. There's no leering. It's an action sequence. It's a brilliantly funny moment as she stomps out of the ocean in the background towards the teens like a Terminator fresh from the future, absolutely determined to destroy. And it's not funny just because she's naked, but because she's so unphased by her state when fighting with such wild gusto. It speaks to her as a character for sure, especially the conversation with Percy that immediately follows. 

There's so much to enjoy here (see also Percy's stunning cover of "Maneater" or the "abduction" scene). This isn't a throwaway comedy. It's also not a laugh riot that demands immediate rewatch, but any other time in the past 50 years it would have been an instant cable TV classic. I don't know where it fares from here, but its charms are sure to prevail. 

---

How I came to the indie-Canadian urban drama of Akilla's Escape is an odd one. I was randomly searching movies on the various platforms I have accounts with. One connection led to another, six degrees of Kevin Bacon-style, and I came across Saul Williams. I know Williams primarily from a few tracks of his from the early aughts. He blends spoken word with hip-hop with activism in a very powerful manner such that the few tracks of his I've heard have really stuck with me over the years.

Williams is a multi-multi-hyphenate. He does a bit of everything writing, poetry, music, directing, and yes, acting. It was his profile on my Rogers cable box that brought me to Akilla's Escape. I watch the trailer, it looked interesting enough, but the list of people associated with the production included Robert Del Naja, aka 3D of the band Massive Attack as part of the soundtrack. Williams was the lead, and also the composer, with 3D assisting.

The next day I listened to the soundtrack to Akilla's Escape a half dozen times, which led to a strong desire to watch the production. This is not unusual, as it happened a fair number of times back in the 90's when I'd gorge on a soundtrack long before I'd watched the film.

The story of Akilla's Escape is fairly simple, but the simplicity betrays its depth. Akilla is operating a grow-op in Toronto, where weed has become legal and is controlled by the province. The profits are still there, but competition has gone legit and he wants out. In the process of making his pitch to the criminals he's tangentially beholden to, a robbery goes down. One of the three thieves is captured, and he's just a boy, a mute kid in over his head. Akilla takes responsibility for the boy and gets him safely home to his aunt. But the danger isn't over. Akilla's associates want their goods returned and some intimidation for good measure, and the gang the boy was running with figure him for a snitch that needs to be silenced.

Flashbacks tell us about Akilla's life with his abusive father, drummed out of Jamaica after the political civil war ended and his enforcer status with the losing side marked him a wanted man. He took his family to New York where he started the Garrison Army, a particularly vicious gang, and when Akilla was old enough, brought him into the the fold. But Akilla had to run to Canada after retaliating against his father after repeatedly abusing his mother. It's been nearly 30 years.

But this boy he's saved, he was running with the Garrison, and that makes it personal for Akilla. And when the boy is abducted, Akilla will make sure he's returned safely to his aunty.

Overall this is a well crafted, tightly structured, and contemplative entry in the street gang subgenre. It's well coiled around a remarkably introspective performance by Williams who doesn't come off as an action hero badass, but instead a man capable of doing whatever it is needing done. He wears the weariness of Akilla well. He's tired of the life he's leading. Rather than thinking about something more, it's almost like he wants something less. An escape, you might say.

The film has a great trick in its sleeve, which is casting Thamela Mpumlwana as both the boy Akilla saves and as young Akilla in the flashbacks. Styled completely different, and yet, the resonance of Akilla seeing himself is absolutely the point. 

At times this film bears the scars of its Canadian production budget. With better cameras, lenses, lighting and time, it would look a lot better than it does. It looks fine, but you can tell the late director Officer wanted it to look amazing.  This should look like a Michael Mann picture, but it can only reach.

It's very much straddles the line between vibes movie and tone poem, owing a great debt to its soundtrack which weaves in and out of genres from reggae, dub, electronica, ambiant, industrial, gospel, hip-hop and even Spanish guitar. It is a great listen, both in context and out of.


Friday, March 17, 2023

3 Short Paragraphs (Or Not): News of the World

2020, Paul Greengrass (Jason Bourne) -- Netflix

Apparently, I am again in the valley of hiatus, not only from writing about movies, but also watching new movies. I have an unfinished, feeling uninspired, post about all the easy-watch movie rewatches I have done over the past 4 or so months, but its going to sit in drafts for a while. Finding the time, around video games (my latest distraction, after a replay of Sunset Overdrive, is Horizon Forbidden West), and rewatching of older shows (the entirety of Death in Paradise, The Mandalorian and Luther) in anticipation of new seasons and spin-offs, has kept me saddled to the sofa in short bursts. But I am in no mood to write about TV right now.

This western found some time during my morning ritual of sitting, slowly sipping my morning coffee. It takes me a while to get going, and whether I am heading to the office, or WFH, I sit and absorb caffeine and usually watch morning news shows. But their format has been grating on me of late, and after getting the weather down, I have been flicking through my lists of "why haven't I watched this yet?" The other day I settled on this, a low-key western with a solid director and a solid, aging actor. 

Greengrass is mostly known for his part in the Jason Bourne movies, but not so much that I could say he has a signature. If I can say anything for his style is that he focuses on his lead, and gives their character room to breathe. In this movie, Tom Hanks (Castaway) is back as Captain Jefferson Kyle Kidd, an ex-Confederate soldier who wanders Texas reading the news to those willing to give up a dime. Its not so much about being able to read or not, but having the time or energy to read a bunch of newspapers from other places, and learn a bit more about the rest of the world. Kidd gives that moment to weary rural folk, along with a bit of showmanship as he relates his stories. He struck me as someone who understood there were so many perspectives in the world, and that the people from both sides (The North and The South) could be helped by hearing that they were all ... just people with stories.

He finds himself tasked with taking a young girl (Helena Zengel, Die Tochter) back home to her family, after he finds the man previously tasked with it lynched on the side of the road. She was taken six years prior by Kiowa raiders so she pretty much identifies as "Indian". He doesn't want the job, cannot afford the time it will take, but when pressed, does it anyway. So, road story, as Westerns often are. Grand visages, dusty empty spaces and dangers everywhere. And a young girl who is taken away from the only family she remembers, being taken back to a family she doesn't know, by a man she can barely communicate with.

When I watched movies like this, especially when in the deep throes of watching and rewatching movies made mostly for their spectacle, I wonder about the how's and why's. Its a quiet movie, not even focused on incredible performances. Everything is low key, subtle and understated. Its solid story telling and acting, but nothing of note. And yet, strangely satisfying. Sometimes we just need a quiet story about people Doing The Right Thing. I like being reminded that the movie watching, and making experiences, covers many spectrums, and it was why I used to be so enthused about the medium.

Thursday, December 23, 2021

T&K's XMas (2021) Advent Calendar: Day 23 - Dashing Home for Christmas

A Toast to HallmarKent: Dashing Home for Christmas - 2020, d. Amy Force - CityTV

The Draw: 


Because I'm a glutton for punishment. I've got a backlog of Hallmarkies that I *could* write about but when I'm doing "A Toast to..." I basically need to either make notes while watching or watch the whole thing again.  I just don't feel like watching anything I've seen again.  

I've come down with my traditional "I'm on vacation now" illness, so I'm laying in bed with a laptop to write on and my phone to watch the movie and so, here I go with some off-brand, Canadian-made, holiday romance, chosen only at random in as much as the picture featuring the lead couple showed TTC streetcars in the background so that was my deciding factor.

HERstory: 
Establishing shots of Toronto.  Many, many, many establishing shots of Toronto.  Establishing shots with heavy, heavy snowfall.  So are we to assume this is Toronto and it's snowing heavily?  You'd think so, right? Wait for it...

Management consultant Emily is trying to get her client to see that whatever spreadsheets she's presenting and jargon she's spewing is the right choice but that maybe thinking about it over the holdays is for the best.  At this point, we're not exactly clear as the viewer that she is not this man's employee.  It's subtle.  But Emily actress Paniz Zade is not pulling off the corporate speak very convincingly (mainly because it's not well written).  Anyway, the point of this is less the business talking and more that she's running late for her flight.  She mentions that she's made it from downtown Manhattan to her seat in less than 30 minutes before, but I don't think she's ever tried to make it from Front Street in Toronto to Pearson in the same amount of time...that is unless she's flying out of the Island Airport at which point she might be okay.  There is inclement weather that is troubling her though, and her rideshare is waiting outside for her.  So, of course, with these three things (being late for flight, ride share waiting, and weather troubles) she stops to call her family to tell her she's on her way.  Precious minutes, Emily!  Call them from the car, or the airport or ANY OTHER TIME!

Outside, where it's kind of sunny (you can see the cloudy blue sky in the reflection of the building) and not the heavy snow flurries the establishing shots presented, Emily has her jacket wide open, no gloves or hat, like it's, say, mid-springtime in, looks like Barrie, despite all the Christmas decorations and the Santa around the front of the building.  She mindlessly runs into a woman carrying presents on the snowless sidewalk and helps her pick them up.  She donates some money to the charity Santa to show she's a good person deep down, and she rushes to the edge of the sidewalk where, Simon, a handsome, towheaded, bespectacled man of appropriate romantic age in a light jacket and not-jaunty-enough scarf is totally in her way with his many many bags.  Why Emily cannot negotiate around his bags on the hundreds of surrounding meters of sidewalk is unclear.  Her ride share drives past (do they do that?  0-stars for that driver.  Shit.) and she steps into the street with her wheely bag, only to accidentally trip over it and Simon comes to her rescue, ish.  He feels bad, and offers her a ride in his car share.  

Smash cut to the now very snowy highway establishing shot, but then cut to the interior of the car which has superimposed background scenes of downtown Toronto with heavy digital snow.  So what is it, are they on the highway, or are they downtown? Simon talks Emily's ear off as Emily tries to ignore him while texting her family.  Rude much?  Emily apologizes, he's in sales and likes to talk, so he decides to bug the driver who has to negotiate the messy snowy Toronto terrain with Toronto's notoriously aggressive drivers, but hey, what does he really need to concentrate on?

At the airport, where it's stopped snowing again, Emily gets pulled aside for additional security check.  The security lady doesn't like Emily's attitude and takes seeming great pleasure in sifting through all her things and messing up her neat packaging job.  Emily, hurredly repacks and knocks her wallet on the floor, and doesn't notice.  Bound to be a problem.

Emily gets to boarding (which seems to be the front of an office building, but I digress) and Simon is right behind her (it's not a long line, just the two of them).  Emily finds that her premium class seat was given away while she was in security and she's only offered a middle seat which she is none-too-pleased with (jeez, Emily, you're in a rush, take what you can get) and she starts to get all particular with the lady checking her in.  Simon offers to exchange his aisle seat for her middle seat since he feels guilty about his luggage getting in her way, or whatever.  Okay, I get that she was delayed by security, but Simon arrives behind her in line for check-in... they got to the airport, for the same flight (to Seattle apparently) at the same time. So why does he arrive behind her in line.  Maybe he had a huge problem with his many bags of luggage? Or perhaps needed to take a big ol' poopy? Who knows, just weird.  Emily offers to buy Simon a drink on the plane.

All Seattle flights are being diverted to Butte, Montana due to a Polar Vortex. Looking at a map, the flight path from Toronto to Seattle... yeah, Butte is on the way.  Checks out.  In the holding pen, Emily is the last to find a seat, because she was probably being a nuisance to some poor flight staff about when they were taking off again.  She finds a seat next to Simon (after he moves his many bags). He again tries to engage in small talk but she just wants to listen to music and do her spreadsheets (no XMas deadline as far as we know yet). But the flights are grounded for the night.  

At the hotel, Emily discovers her missing wallet, much to the delight of the desk clerk who really doesn't like Emily's attitude.  She releases her room, which Simon swoops in and takes up with the desk clerk completely swooning over our be-spectacled hunk.  Simon offers Emily to share the room, and the desk clerk is not pleased especially after she just upgraded the room for Simon to the Honeymoon Suite.  The porter expects a tip, and kind generous Simon, somehow, doesn't believe in tipping I guess as he just goes in the room leaving wallet-less Emily out there.  

While Simon is in the bathroom, Emily calls home, and of course the topic of conversation is about the cute guy she just has to spend the night with.  After the call she both checks Simon for a ring, and for a cute butt.  But in the bathroom, Simon has left a mess of things all over the place.  Toothpaste in the sink, splatter on the glass, toiletries everywhere.  Why the extra toilet paper is half unwrapped I do not know.   Emily, cleans up, then tries to run the shower but there's no hot water, and when she comes out of the bathroom she finds that Simon is in the Honeymoon Suite tub, the insinuation that he used up the hot water (really? What hotel has ever run out of hot water?)

Turns out both Emily and Simon are seasoned travelers for their jobs, but that doesn't explain why Simon has so much luggage.  Experienced travelers pack light.  Have you never seen Up In The Air? 

They have Honeymoon Suite chocolates (Hershey Kisses - it is Butte afterall) with champagne (out of big ol tumblers?) and have chit-chat about their holiday plans, relationship talk, and their family life (Simon has no siblings and dead parents so he spends Christmas with college buddies, Emily is visiting her parents and pregnant sister for XMas).  What I basically don't believe is that these two very attractive, seasoned road warriors don't just get it on for one fleeting night.

Like, 5:30 am Emily needs to run to see if she can catch an early flight because her sister's in labor, but the flight desk doesn't open until 6:30 am (it is Butte afterall), but the desk lady says given the ice outside that maybe no flights are taking off today, and suggests she go rent a car asap.  But without her wallet, no credit card or license, she's kind of stuck.  Emily gets a bit flirty with The Mr. Rental Car Agent and he decides he will help her out, but he cannot rent her a car without a valid driver's license.  He can rent her the car, just he needs *someone* with a valid license.  Enter Simon who agrees so long as he can play the tunes which is aggressive rock music which is like strike two for Simon.  Emily's sister calls, noting that her labor pains were a false alarm, but the call is taken over the car speakers where there's a little "Cute guy" talk before Emily frantically turns off the car speakers.

There's a moment on the drive where Simon says he's hot, Emily says she's still wearing her jacket.  "Good thing we're not dating, we're totally incompatible".  Uh, yeah, because people who run hot and people who run cold are such a terrible mix.  They have a quick stop to view the Greenscreen Rockies.  And... time check, I'm only HALF WAY THROUGH THIS FILM.  Are they going to play the 8-hour drive to Butte in real time?  

Oh, mygod, Simon's luggage is strapped to the roof of the car.  

I just realized that they had a choice between a compact or a passenger van, and Emily chose the compact?  I mean, when you're driving in the winter a compact isn't preferable, not the most sure-footed on winter highways.  Plus, the passenger van would have been good for Simon's luggage to be *not* exposed to the elements.

At a diner, Emily gets very picky about her meal...very, very picky.  Like, annoyingly picky, like, the-diner-staff-is-definitely-spitting-in-her-meal annoying.  Simon tips big to the waitress, so what was the deal at the hotel, Simon?

Caption: "450 miles to home."  Transactional Emily, and Sensitive, Aggressively Cheerfyl Simon both discover they love Christmas music.  Then they blow a tire.  Simon wants to call roadside assistance, but Emily changes out the spare.  Back on the road, Emily finds there is a once-a-day train that will get them home but they just missed it.  While inside, the rental is towed.  Emily is crushed.  But it's only December 23rd, so hey, all is not lost.  They can go to the hotel across the street and catch the train in the morning.

They get separate rooms at the hotel, and a loneliness montage plays over a hushed singing non-standard Christmas tune.  They meet cute in the hallway and go for a walk on "the cute little main street" which I think is just Queen Street East, definitely not "cute".  They find the only little patch of snow on the street and make snowballs, while Simon juts off for literally 30 seconds to throw out trash, only to return with a gift bag containing wine and snacks and sandwiches.  He says everything else is "closed for the holidays".  It's December 23rd.  Nothing should be closed for the holidays yet.  What kind of effing "small town Washington" is this that its shopping closes two days before Christmas?  It's not like it's even nighttime yet, it's still clearly daytime.  

Drinking their wine and eating their snacks and, as far as I can tell, whitebread and butter sandwiches, they bond over their love of the Muppet Movie and then a jazzy Christmas tune plays over a montage of them having fun, which ends with Simon getting a text saying that bro-Christmas-hang is off.   With his Christmas plans falling through Simon is bummed and calls it a night.  Emily's phone interrupts a mildly tipsy attempt at a kiss.

Emily's sister calls, and Emily realizes what a great guy Simon is, and mentions that it'll be Christmas Eve when she arrives and they haven't decorated the tree yet.  Mom on speakerphone basically invites Emily's travel companion over for Christmas, which, I mean, we all knew that's where this was heading from like, minute 10 all along, didn't we?

While waiting for the train, a man carrying Christmas gifts trips and spills them all.  Simon gets up to help, and say "wait here".  He disappears for 20 seconds, enough time for the guys to say to Emily "I don't know where you found him, but don't lose him."  Who just says that?  Anyway, Simon returns with a gift bag for the guy to carry the presents in.  Simon is just the master of disappearing for less than a minute and returning with needful things...or, well, gift bags.

The train is cancelled and everyone leaves the platform for the bus station.  A nice woman offers to change seats so that Emily and Simon can sit together (because, he's cute).  Simon leads a carolling on the bus, which isn't annoying at all, but some people seem into it.  With 20 minutes left, Emily reads a text from her boss about suggested headcount reductions for her client, and Simon, nice guy Simon, isn't very keen that Emily's job involves getting people fired.  He thinks it's a sign of a flawed character and gives her the cold shoulder.  

In Seattle, they say their goodbyes, but Emily, basically, is rejected by Simon, who is being so judgey about her job. After parting, sad Christmas music plays while Emily looks at photos her and Simon took on their journey together.  A pep talk from her sister tells her to turn around and tell the boy how she feels, surely he'll come around to knowing there's more to her than just her job.  She's actually a good sister.

Upon returning to bus station, she finds Simon walking around with gift bags (where does he keep getting those), and it turns out he's got all this luggage and stuff packed full of toys for the toy drive.  He's going to hand them out on Christmas to the kids.  Is that how Toy Drives work?   They talk, they kiss, she brings him home for Christmas, because he's her Christmas gift this year.

The Formulae:
Okay, I was pretty surprised to find this didn't really sit with the usual holiday romance formula, but instead was attempting a hybrid of Planes, Trains and Automobiles with Up In The Air on an extremely modest budget.

There's the looming Christmas deadline that Emily has, although it's just a bit of background noise that's not clarified until it really becomes a problem in the 20-minutes-to-go complication spot.  And yes, there's a 20-minutes-to-go complication. Sigh.

The leads are frequently (and prematurely) mistaken for a couple...at the hotel, at the train station, at the diner.

Oh, the almost-kiss that gets interrupted, this time by a cel phone.

Unformulae: 
I thought for a moment at the beginning when Emily donated money to the charity Santa that he would turn out to be a magical Santa, and that there would be silly Christmas magic, but nope.

At this stage I think there's been a few "gotta get home for Christmas" road movie romances (I believe this year's Time for X to Come Home for Christmas on Hallmark was a road movie) so it's not that unformulaic... but still not the most conventional of Christmas romances because there can't be any decorating montages, cookie-baking/flour fights in a kitchen, or Christmas tree shopping sequences.

True Calling?
Enh, close enough.  I wouldn't say Emily was just "dashing home real quick" though.  Especially since she left on December 21 which is like 3 days early for the big city girl to be going back to her...big city hometown.

The Rewind: 
When Emily and Simon meet out front of the office building, there are seemingly weird greenscreened shots with downtown Toronto backdrops behind them.  I was wondering why, when they clearly did some shooting in Toronto, they were greenscreening the backdrops.  It turns out they shot that scene in Barrie (which must be a newish building since I last lived in Barrie in the year 2000), so any wider screen sequence needed to have a bigger city backdrop than Barrie, Ontario.

Seriously, those sandwiches were just bread sandwiches. 

The Regulars:
Director Amy Force (sounds like a GI Joe name) is a recent upstart in the off-brand Christmas romance movie world with this, Christmas In the Rockies, and Christmas on 5th Avenue, in the past two years.

Paniz Zade is an Iranian-Canadian actress who has appeared in a few different off-brand holiday movies (including Christmas in the Rockies and Santa Squad).  She's got an appealing presence but I don't know that she ever quite finds the character of Emily in this, but it's not really her fault since the script doesn't give her a consistent thread to pull on.  The key to successful movies is heightening the characters so that they really go on a journey (not physically but emotionally).  By the end of this Emily is just sort of like "hey, I kind of like this guy" and he's sort of made her a little bit less self-involved as a person.  It's not a dramatic enough swing, it's too subtle.  I get that they didn't want her to be a raging bitch, as they seed in enough niceties to make her not a monster, but maybe that's what she needed to be, more of a monster, though with layers underneath that Simon brought out...?

They see fit to make Emily's family reflect Zade's diversity, somewhat, with her sister played by an Italian Canadian, her dad played by a Canadian actor of indeterminate descent, and her mother played by Valerie Buhagiar, the Maltese-Canadian actress who was the host of Showcase Review which was one of my prime venues for discovering a wider world of movies in my late teens and early 20's. Love her.  But given all that, Emily's family is clearly not the "Nichols" family.  I don't know why they couldn't have just tweaked the script... but I have to remember these are made for selling to Lifetime or other American networks where "foreign sounding last names" are off-putting ...or something.  

Adrian Spencer, who plays Simon plays a bit role in another off-brand holiday romance Christmas in London.  He is indeed handsome, but again, they don't really find the character in the script to really make him stand out.  He's a nice guy, he likes to talk, he's a generous person, but he needs more extremes.  A messy bathroom or bad taste in music doesn't really cut it.  The dead parents are one thing, but even that he seems over and accepting of (he's a "look on the bright side of life" kind of guy), but he seems to be getting sad about being the last man standing in his group of single friends... but not nearly sad enough.  He doesn't have enough soul to really connect with, he's just ... nice.  

How does it Hallmark? 
It's got all the cheap movie trappings of a Hallmark, but a mildly better story.  The performances needed more life to them, more humour (the characters "joke" with one another but it's pretty weak how they do it), more drama.  It's a better example of the off-brand movies, but very middle-of-the-road compared to a typical Hallmark.

How does it movie? 
I don't fault it for ambition, but they didn't have the budget to pull it off. 

Did I enjoy it... kind of, sort of.  There was enough terrible set decorating and weird wtf moments to be entertained, but it started feeling long in the tooth about halfway through, and the late stage "complication" was kind of bullshit.  I did like the reconciliation moment though... and then there was 4 unnecessary minutes of Simon at the Nichols house because they ran short on time.

What this movie really needed was some legit steaminess. Zade and Spencer make for a good looking duo, and it's hard to believe that given the situation they wouldn't be hitting it.  I know that's not what these Christmas holiday romances do, but that's really what this needed.  If you wanted to make it weird and awkward, how weird and awkward would it be had they hit it that first night in the Honeymoon Suite, then she gets up to leave, very early, and then needs his help with the car and they're stuck together actually, you know, having to find out about each other.  If this was a "supposed to be a one-night-stand but then becomes something more" story... that, like, quadrouples the interest factor. You need a complication?  Sex makes things complicated.  Letting Zade and Spencer introduce a lot of sexual tension and confusion into the mix would have made this ...well, not a real movie, but certainly a better one.  

How Does It Snow?  
Fakey fakey fake fake.  Real snow in establishing shots though.  Toronto was getting hit hard.

Monday, November 8, 2021

Finch

2021, Miguel Sapochnik (Repo Men) -- download

There are some movies that I see the trailer for and I just know that I will enjoy them, in fact come Hell or High Water, I will enjoy them. Yeah, I can be that way. So, when I see a trailer for a PoAp movie where an old guy builds a robot to take care of his dog, mixing in heart-felt hijinx and slap-stick, I know I am there. But y'know, I am not even sure why that does it for me, just something about the whimsy and schmaltzy feel-good with robots is in my wheelhouse.

Finch (Tom Hanks, Castaway) is a robotics expert hiding out in the remains of his corporate offices in St. Louis, underneath a single functioning windmill, generating the power he needs to survive, after the world has ended. While Finch is our last man, we get the idea that he chose to be a last man long before the world ended, as he is a bit of an odd-duck and more than a little antisocial. He is also dying, likely from the ever present solar radiation because of the no longer present ozone layer. But Goodyear the dog will need a caretaker, and therefore Finch builds one. Near sentience in robots must be a thing in Finch's day as he doesn't really pay any heed to creating new life, no great ponderings of the Great Meaning of Life, just a quick load of as much data as he can, and a fast-track into talking & walking. A big storm is coming and it will end St. Louis, even more than the End of the World did, so they have to get out of town.

So, road story. The best PoAp stories are road stories. From St Louis to San Franciso, because Finch was never brave enough to actually visit the city. But there shouldn't be any people there, and that should suit his dog and his robot, who names himself Jeff. Jeff is not a slick example of robotics, more like a teenager with a full set of encyclopedias in his head, which he can barely make sense of. But all the emotion and turmoil of youth. He is still learning what it is to be alive, and what his purpose is, while also being on the run from... everything. Not that there is a lot, for there is very little else in this movie but the trio, as the world has indeed died around them. The story is compact and concise and doesn't stray much from the singular goal. Also, Finch hates people so I doubt if they even came across the Helpful Survivor, they would give them a chance.

Jeff (motion cap'd and voice by Caleb Landry Jones, Get Out) is built to catch on quickly, learning to drive, to follow Finch's orders (and not always literally), and to prepare for the day when it's only him and Dog (Finch rarely calls the dog by his name). But the whole emotions thing and interpersonal interaction are the bigger challenge, especially considering Finch is such a dick to him. CLB handles him sooooo well, giving us a childlike WALL-E meets Stephen Hawking voice, supported by tons of minute and overt physical acting -- the regular wiggling of his Mickey Mouse sized fingers, and the reaction to when he hears a loose screw rattling around inside his own head -- well, it had me giggling constantly. And yet, there was weight there, both physically (he probably weighs a ton) and emotionally -- Jeff's feelings constantly get hurt. But he always recovers, like a kicked Boston Robotics dog.

This is not a tour de force for Hanks, but he plays the role admirably well. He knows he is going to die, and there is no shirking away from that. There is no miraculous ending, though some miracles in small amount do prevail. Apparently Finch was so concerned about hiding from people and surviving in his small bit of the world, he never considered what had happened outside it. The ends opened-ended, a whole wide world of experience for Jeff to capture, as long as he has Dog. 

Sunday, February 10, 2019

3 Short Paragraphs: Kin

2018, Jonathan & Josh Baker (the original Bag Man) -- download

I am fan of those scifi shorts that are all over YouTube and Vimeo. Young directors/writers/special effects teams cut their teeth on something self-contained, something fully thought out without the need to put in the filler material to round out the three acts of a feature film. Typically on limited budgets, they contain the story to a few sets, and round out the rest with CGI. And they can explore ideas that would never generally see the light of day on the big screen.

Kin started as the short Bag Man by twins Jonathan & Josh Baker, about a kid who travels from an urban setting, to the countryside and along the way we find out what he has in the bag, which I cannot do this post, without revealing its a futuristic / alien rifle. The short is just absolutely lovely, so lovingly shot, well lit and tightly acted.

Kin is that expansion into feature film and, well, its not all that successful. It suffers the expected failings of having plot & characterization inflated to meet a full movie, and meet with the typical expectations of the scifi movie audience money backers. We take the black city kid, this time with adoptive father (requisite recognizable face; Dennis Quaid) and ex-con adoptive brother, who gets the kid mixed up in his ex-con trouble. But he has a laser gun, found on the body of some unknown battle-suited soldier in an abandoned warehouse, and with it he & his brother lead the bad guys on a merry chase across the US. Add in a stripper with a heart of gold (Zoë Kravitz) and a cameo by Michael B Jordan, and we have a run of the mill action-er, that barely remembers the quality directing of the short.

Tuesday, August 25, 2015

3 Short Paragraphs: Transit

2012, Antonio Negret -- netflix

I refuse to start a new category for this blog, where I purposely watch and reflect upon Straight to VOD movies. I will end up doing enough of that unintentionally, when that mood strikes on Netflix. That mood where you swing through your My List twice going, "Not in the mood, nah, too heavy, too stupid, nah, not tonight..." Then you start browsing the site's terrible categorization, created just to force you to watch stuff it says is in your wheelhouse but usually is just meant to increase their numbers in some arcane formula you cannot hope to understand.

It has Jim Caviesel, whom I have liked long before Person of Interest and not just because I stood behind him in EB Games while he bought a World of Warcraft strategy book, back in the day when WOW meant something. It also has James Frain, that British guy who is in everything but whose name you cannot put to the face, until you see him and go, "Oh he's THAT guy." Also, he likes to play intense bad guys, but when you first see him on screen, you just cannot take that pudgy smooshy face seriously as a bad guy, until he talks. Then, yep, scary. So, Jim is the dad, the good guy and James is the criminal, the bad guy.

Family on vacation trying to reconnect gets mixed up in the Evil Plan of some homicidal bank robbers. Their destinies become entwined when they both get stopped at a roadblock, and the Bad Guys hide their stuff in the Good Guy's car. Dear cops running road blocks -- if you cannot identify the Bad Guys by sight, look for the people wearing only black and driving a matt black muscle car. Pretty good chance they are the Bad Guys. Jim has to defend his family from said Bad Guys, which apparently is the only way his family will trust him again, after his stint in jail for white collar crime. Terrible movie which disappointed Marmy immensely because it set the third act in a gator infested bayou and NO ONE WAS EATEN BY GATORS !  Poo.

Pretty good poster, in a early 2000s grungy way I still appreciate.

Tuesday, July 14, 2015

I Saw This!! Anxiety (or, I haven't written a review here since April, so here's 8)

I Saw This (double exclamation point) is our all-too regular feature wherein Graig or David attempt to write about a bunch of movies they watched some time ago and meant to write about but just never got around to doing so. Now they they have to strain to say anything meaningful lest they just not say anything at all. And they can't do that, can they?

Okay, time to get back up on this horse.

Noah - 2014, d. Darren Aronofsky -- netflix
Dogtooth ("Kynodontas")- 2009, d. Yorgos Lanthimos --netflix
Zero Dark Thirty - 2012, d. Katheryn Bigelow -- netflix
Nebraska - 2013, d. Alexander Payne -- netflix
John Wick - 2014, d. Chad Stahelski, David Leitch -- blu-ray
Harmontown - 2014, d. Neil Berkeley -- netflix
Blue Ruin - 2013, d. Jeremy Saulnier -- netflix
The Scribbler - 2014, d. John Suits -- netflix

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When I was becoming a burgeoning cinephile in the mid-to-late 1990s, taking note of writers, directors, actors and actresses, composers and other names on the production roster that were making the movies that I both liked and connected with (sometimes deeply, sometimes superficially), Darren Aronofsky was high on my list of directors to follow, a singularly intriguing creative person worth being devoted to.  What struck me most about Aronofsky wasn't anything he did on screen, but what he did off-screen, which was bridge the worlds of comics and cinema.  With comics obviously being a very integral part of my life, releasing a movie with a comic book tie-in (not just a licensed prequel, sequel or adaptation) was a sure-fire way of getting my attention.  Aronofsky did this with his very first feature, Pi, and I was hooked.  The one-shot comic (published by Dark Horse if I recall correctly) and the feature were both black and white art-house endeavours, cerebral and somewhat impenetrable, but fascinating and puzzling in equal, mostly good measure.

His follow-up was Requiem For A Dream (2000), one of the most profoundly disturbing and intense films I've ever seen.  It's a brilliant piece of cinema, joining the likes of Clockwork Orange and Dancer In The Dark as astounding cinema that can only be watched once.

Aronofsky went back to comics again with The Fountain (2006), his third and highly troubled feature, creating an accompanying graphic novel (with artist Kent Williams) that expands upon the three timelines presented in that film.  I owned the graphic novel for years before read it, as I wouldn't read it until I ha watched the film.  I wound up owning the film on dvd for some time before I actually watched it and subsequently read the graphic novel.  While I appreciated the entire endeavour, it left me somewhat cold.  Despite this, I would follow Aronofsky to The Wrestler (2008) and Black Swan (2010) in the theatres, finding both to be great movies on their own, but again not resonating with me.  I was disappointed when he dropped out of The Wolverine, as I thought he would make a great comic book movie, particularly a great, brooding and dark Wolverine story, and even more disappointed to find out his biggest budget movie would be a biblical adaptation.  How boring.

Yet, Aronofsky's next feature, Noah, would find once more be accompanied by a graphic novel (actually an adaptation of the screenplay by Nico Henrichon) fleshing out his tale at something less directly religious and more disaster/spectacle/epic.  Even still, I waffled with seeing this production, my interest level never reaching past mild.  The graphic novel would be a pricey purchase and the film's subject matter far from enticing, so getting the full experience (as I only assume it was intended) was somewhat off-putting.

It was only its arrival on Netflix that I finally conceded in watching the film, and I found it a curious product.  I'm still not entirely sure I understand why it exists.  It's almost as if it was made in an exercise to see whether the Bible could be mined for blockbuster motion pictures.  The focus seems to be more spectacle than anything resembling religious parity.  This isn't the "true" story of Noah being told, and, not being a religious student of any sort, I'm not even sure what the biblical message of Noah is supposed to intone, but I would be surprised if the biblical moral was at all in Aronofsky's mind when putting together this production.

It is indeed epic, a sweeping tale of birthright and revenge, of fathers and sons, of obedience, love and betrayal, the temptations of evil, righteousness and the gray area between selfishness and selflessness.  Noah is a man convinced in his mission, unwavering in his belief that God has told him what needs to be done, and the climax of the film deals with exactly how unwavering will he be.  Can he perform an unspeakable evil as part of God's will?

Noah is a flawed beast, an awkward behemoth that's both awe-inspiring and teetering on the fringes of being comically laughable.  The key cast of Russel Crowe, Jennifer Connelly, Ray Winstone, Emma Watson, Logan Lerman, and Douglas Booth are extremely serious minded about the events they're participating in (Winstone may be a bit more on the scenery chewing side, though), probably its saving grace from being B-movie camp.  Anthony Hopkins as Methuselah provides the film's brief moments of comic relief...or marginal levity as it were. 

It's still hard to believe this film got made.  It's not unwatchable but it's also not outright entertaining.  It has moments of action and some visual sense of wonder but the characters never settle in as believable people, nor do they reach the height of mystical figures.  They persist as figures in a tale, servicing a specific story with no will the change the outcome of the tale.  The emotion that should be wraught throughout never materializes under the weight of the expectations of the story at-hand.  That tsunami set to encompass the world sort of nullifies almost any other drama the film attempts to build.


As noted in David's take[link], there's a sense that this was supposed to be even more wondrous and metaphysical than it actually was (which perhaps that graphic novel I've yet to read bears out?), and I think the tale could have used a bit more of an alien setting to explore its characters and story, distancing itself from any form of Earth-based history (real or Biblical or allegorical)

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I had come across (the just defunct) The Dissolve's best films of the decate [so far] list [link] and became somewhat intrigued with seeing all of these movies.  Melancholia, which I reviewed back in April [link], was actually the last of a small streak of these that I watched, but Dogtooth was the first.

The idea behind this Greek film is fascinating, the story of three siblings who are the subjects of lifelong social experimentation by their parent.  They've effectively been held hostage in their family home and yard, unable to view the outside world at all, except through the limited exposure to outsiders brought into the home by their father.  They are taught the wrong words to represent objects, they are told that the land outside of the fence is toxic, and that a sibiling (that likely never existed) escaped and is trapped out there in the land just beyond the fence.  They are kept placated, if not happy, by an endless stream of lies, some elaborate others simple.  Now in their late teens and early twenties, they're starting to become restless and curious, though the outisde world is still a monster.  The main lie, from which the title draws its name, is that they will only be allowed outside the compound once they lose a dogtooth (the parents more than aware that those permanent teeth aren't going anywhere on their own).

The film plays out with deliberate, observational pacing.  It's not interested in celebrating or reveling in the lies the parents are telling the children, nor is it condeming them.  There's a passivity to the camera -- it's of the handheld, mobile, sort, a seeming adherence to the old Dogme '95 aesthetic -- a watchful eye peering in unobtrusively on events with no judgement borne out for what it sees.  In every right these kids parents are monsters (even before dad's heinous act with a VCR) but they're portrayed just as carefully as the kids are.

In my anticipation for watching this film, knowing only the rough plot and a few details, I was expecting something more exploitive, a bit more kitschy or on display for laughs.  I was anticipating looking in with fascination and delight, I wasn't expecting the engrossing curiousity, disgust and intensity with which I watched.  Something like the kids being told that flying planes overhead are actually just toys (and once they've passed out of eyesight they can be found in the grass as mother has thrown a toy in the grass to be found) could be riotously amusing as, say, a Will Ferrell film, but here it's bizarre but certainly not played for laughs.  Likewise, their listening to Sinatra's "Fly Me To The Moon" in English, being willfully mistranslated to Greek by their parents could be comical but sits just as it is...something that happens in this household.  The film ceases to continue so much as it ends.  There's easily more story to be told here, as the criminality of the parents actions, or the psychological implications of what's been done to them are left unexplored.  A second feature following at least one of the kid's journey into the real world is filled with tremendous possibility (just imagine their reaction to a real plane).

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Zero Dark Thirty was an Oscar winner for the 2012 cinematic year, and a resoundingly successful follow-up for its director Katheryn Bigelow after winning best director for the Hurt Locker.  It's at this point the infamous story of the intelligence tracking and death of Osama Bin Laden, and while many who have seen it focus on the gripping third act's focus on SEAL Team 6 as they invade the compound they suspect is housing Bin Laden, they tend to gloss over the rather fiercly feminist aspect of the film.  The progressively feminist story is purly by its true story nature, not so much by design, as Jessica Chastain's Maya, a recent graduate and recruit into the CIA, is thrust head-first into the war on terror and takes the lead on finding Bin Laden.

All manner of obstacles are in Maya's way, political and organizational are the tip of the iceberg.  Facing down illegal torture methods, possible threats to her life, systemic sexism, and her own novice background are all trial by fire for her.  These things harden her as they threaten to break her, but her resolve is strong, and her persistence, as well as her intelligence and dedication, is enviable.

As a "based on a true story" film, Zero Dark Thirty is a masterpiece.  It's equal parts military and political thriller, as well as personal drama and, in its own way, revenge fantasy.  It juggles many levels of beurocracy, international travel, intrigue, and more with a fluidity that finds no diversion it takes out of place. The story is propelled forward with increasing momentum, the audience already knows where its going but is never made to feel like it's just biding its time before getting there.  Though no doubt there are embellishment, unlike, say, Argo which took extreme (and obvious) liberties with its source material in the name of manufactured drama, Zero Dark Thirty rarely, if ever, steps on its own toes or hits its audience over the head with false notes.

The shame here is Bigelow has crafted an immensely entertaining and successful feature, award-winning and important, delivering the story of Bin Laden's death in just over a year after it happened allowing for some sense of public closure, and yet she did not become a highly sought after, in-demand director.  Bigelow's execution here is deft, navigating multiple genres and wonderful character and world building with defiant ease.  It's a film on the same scale as a Bond or Bourne movie which would make her a natural target for taking on a blockbuster franchise and yet we never hear her name in the rumour mills for the next big feature.  Is it institutionalized sexism of Hollywood studios, or is it that Bigelow is just not interesed in those kinds of films (Point Break, Strage Days and K-19 tell me otherwise).

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Was Nebraska also on that aforementioned list of best 50 films of the decade so far?  Even if it wasn't, it'd been a film sitting on my "to watch" list for a long time.  I loved the pacing and light humour of Alexander Payne's The Decendents and I had heard great things about Bruce Dern, Will Forte and June Squibb's (award nominated) performances in the film, but seeing as there wasn't a single sci-fi, action, fantasy, or metatextual "gotcha" to the movie, it just took a long time (languishing in my Netflix queue for months on end) for me to get to it.

It's a simple story filled with complex emotions.  Dern is a cantankerous senior citizen who's going senile while also restless as his freedoms are stripped from him.  He's never had a good relationship with his sons (Forte and Bob Oedenkirk), and he and his wife (Squibb) can barely stand one another's company.  When a Publisher's Clearinghouse-esque letter arrives telling him that he "may have already won", he's convinced he needs to make the trip to their home office in Nebraska to claim the prize.  Everyone around him tells him it's just junk mail, but he's dedidcated to the trip.  Eventually Forte concedes to driving him, giving the two men their first ever real moment of togetherness.

It's a road trip movie and a family movie, as they stop and visit elements of Dern's past along the way.  His home town revels in his story of sudden fortune and the extended family gather for an impromptu reunion that goes about as well as any assembly of family goes.  It's frequently chuckle-funny, occasionally awkward and sad, but always rewarding.  There's a depth and truth to the story at play, particularly to the emotions, with Dern being a man who has never cared for showing his, and Forte coming to understand not just who his father was before, but who he is now, and that like most parents, despite the difficulties they have, he has done as best as he knows how.

Forte delivers a perception-shattering performance.  The weirdo/goofball/creepy characters he's played in previous films and in Saturday Night Live sketches fade away almost immediately as Forte's eyes show a knowingness, a maturity and wearyness that he's never earnestly expressed before.  Dern's Oscar winning performance is almost the easier job, being gruff, stoic, and occasionally completely unsure of his surroundings, but he delivers a character that never wavers in identity and provides the framework for everything else in the film to react to.  Squbb, meanwhile, is the overt comic releif, the Oliver Hardy to Dern's Stan Laurel.  She's mouthy, aggressive and uncensored (she even shocked me a couple of times), the perfect counterpoint to Dern's weary silence.  She didn't win the best supporting actress Oscar, but it was a likewise worthy performance.

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We're not Keanu fan's over at the Kent household.  While I have a greater threshold for Keanu than the missus does, it's not really much of a qualification...it's like saying I can take  cleaning the litter box more better than she can... which is a bad example because she definitely cleans up the cat crap more than I do... but I digress.  Point being, Keanu is not a great actor, in fact he's pretty terrible.  Consistently so.  Limited facial expression, even more limited vocal intonation, the most animated Keanu ever got was in the Bill & Ted movies and the last of those was over 25 years ago.  The perfect role for Mr. Reeves would be Pinocchio because he's a little wooden boy...except that Pinocchio would demand he turn into something resembling human.  Maybe if Pinocchio turned into a T-1000 at the end of that story instead.  Scratch that, just make him a Terminator and be done with it because that's spot on the type of range he displays.

Woah.

Anyway, John Wick.  John Wick showed up in last October in theatres with little hype or enthusiasm (because Keanu's last bunch of pictures were all major duds...to be clear, no, not a remake of Gerald McCraney's Major Dad) but became a rare honest-to-goodness blockbuster success through word-of-mouth.   One friend of ours love the movie so much he saw it multiple times in theatres and continually sang its praises (and waited with baited breath for its Blu-Ray release).  That David even spoke effusively aboutit [link] resonated and, with these collective signs  I began to actually want to see the film.

Woah.

The wife was still far from enthused... she gets that way about things with too much hype and/or starring Keanu.  The aforementioned friend (shout out to Troy-who-doesn't-read-this-blog!) got his copy of the film on Blu-Ray, watched it a couple times over and lent it to us for a viewing.  It was a unique experience.  The wife, naturally, wasn't looking forward to it and chose to distract herself from her lack of enjoyment by live-Facebooking her reaction to the film.  I chose to turn out the lights and have a spiked refreshment at hand. 

At first we gently mocked the movie -- a few "Fuck you, Theon!" comments  (something me and the wife shouting regularly at co-star Alfie Allen's Game of Thrones character) and mimicry of Keanu's stilted acting tossed about for good measure -- but then Allen's character, the entitled son of a Russian mobster, goes and kills John Wick's puppy (after he was denied the acquisition of Wick's sweet ride), and things get goofy/serious.  The puppy was a present form Wick's recently deceased wife, so that he wouldn't be alone, and the ex-mob hitman sees only red, and we're thrust, along with John, back into the world he had hoped to leave behind.

It's this world, it's neutral ground hotels, it's secret society gold coins, and it's weird codes of honour, that make the movie.  Keanu is a vehicle for delivering both this world's nuances and it's brutal yet beautifully orchestrated violence, and the film's directors Chad Stahelski and David Leitch and writer Derek Kolstad seemed to understand the exact type of character Keanu should play, and the limits of what he can play.  This was obviously tailor made for him.  He can't quite handle the sombre hurt of the recently widowered nor can he take on the deep emotion of having a piece of his wife restored with the puppy to any great shakes.  But when he's asked to be a cold, calculating orchestrator of violence, which is 90% of Keanu's role here, he nails it straight on.

The film is beautifully stylized, the fluorescent greens and blues saturate the parts of the screen that aren't bathed in shadows.  It's Michael Mann by way of modern graphic novels.  The action is top notch... it's not "another level" like the big budgets of the latest Fast and Furious or Mission Impossible or James Bond feature, but it's full of John Woo-esque gunplay and throw-down, drag-out fights are close to par with the greatest fight porn of the modern day,  The Raid 2 [link].  My favourite of the battles found John Wick taking on Adrianne Palicki's Ms. Perkins, an assassin more ruthless than Wick... but I enjoyed even more Lance Reddick's reaction to her breaking of the hotel rules.

John Wick was exactly what it should've been, only better.  It's a B-movie ratched up to A-level status thanks to savvy filmmaking and tremendous world building.  I even caught the wife, on more than one occassion, watching the movie intently, forgetting about the Facebook updating for a spell.  Though still hard pressed to admit that a Keanu movie actually entertained her, I'm fairly certain there was a begrudging amount of respect there for the end product, and that's about as big a praise for this film as anything. 

Woah.


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Harmontown is a documentary about the creator of the beloved cult TV show Community creator Dan Harmon, and the months following his firing from the show as producer and showrunner after its third season.  Harmon had, before his firing, started a live show/podcast that was part comedy show, part confessional, where he would ruminate with his co-host Jeff Davis about his life, his failures and successes, his frustrations, and anything else he wanted to get off his chest, most of which probably better suited for the therapist's couch than a public forum.

After his firing, at his lowest point, he thrust more energy into his podcast, and he started sensing a bit of a groundswell. Not so much a movement, but a cult of personality forming around him.  Taking a risk, he decided to take the show on the road and let a documentary crew follow him.

It's a film about Harmon, primarily, about who he is as a person, and that person is admittedly very, very difficult.  The film highlights the Harmontown podcast and the people who gravitate towards it, embracing honesty and pain and the communal catharsis it provide, but it's all centered around Harmon and his often self-desctructive tendencies.  The people along for the ride are his girlfriend, Erin McGathy, Davis, and the show's resident Dungeons and Dragons gamesmaster Spencer Crittenden, and each has naturally a different relationship with Harmon.  McGathy bears the biggest brunt of Harmon's self-destructiveness which often manifests as lashing out, while Davis more deals with pushing the show forward.  Spencer meanwhile sits quietly, uncomfortably on the outside of it, and observes.

It's with Spencer's story that Harmontown as a documentary justifies its existence as more than a piece of self-glorification/implosion.  Spencer is the fan's way into Harmontown, as he was a man on the outside who innocuously offered to run a D&D campaign and suddenly found himself a man on the inside.  Spencer is a stereotypical outcast nerd, the kind with a quiet, gruff exterior, a shell hardened by traumatic childhood ostracisation, a person who finds comfort in the world of fantasy and its nuances.  But through his role on Harmontown's podcast he's given the opportunity to have a voice in the world he never though he'd have, to be heard and seen and validated.  As he's on tour he has people, not unlike himself, awkwardly approaching him with admiration and adulation, genuine affection for who he is and what he contributes, and the film captures intimately what that discovery is like for him.  Where Harmon, a bit of a self-aggrandizer, is only marginally surprised by his supportive fanbase (there's an expectation of some level of worship going on, like how a televangelist preacher takes the worship of God as his own), Spencer is genuinely shocked.  Though in their own ways both men are grateful.  It's obvious though that Harmon needs the outpouring of support and affection, almost like a drug, for Spencer it's almost an affirmation that his place in the world is okay.

This is a film that's meant for the fans and the outlier fans, all the avid Community watchers and AV Club message boarders, the people who know what a showrunner is.  It's not that it can't appeal to a broader audience, but without having the shorthand of understanding Harmon from his work (and for sure Community is a devastatingly hilarious and often genious personal endeavour with each character a manifestation of his personality) the uninitiated viewer may just wonder "what's the big deal about this guy?"  That difficult personality Harmon displays can rub even the most ardent fan the wrong way at times.

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Of all the films in this I Saw This!! column, Blue Ruin is the one I enjoyed the most, and yet, it's the one I'm having the hardest time recalling.  I have specific images in mind, a general impression of what the movie is, but a lot of the details are fuzzy.  Perhaps as I write about it, it will come flooding back.  Spoilers will follow.

The film is a low budget revenge thriller (partiall funded via Kickstarter, no less), that's less exactly a thriller, and certainly not your typical revenge story either.  Dwight (Macon Blair) is a drifter living out of a bullet-hole-riddled, tarp-covered car.  He scrounges and survives, but hasn't given up completely on civility, reading novels by flashlight at night.  The police stop by, obviously familiar with Dwight's story, and inform him that the man who killed his parents is being released from jail.  Very quickly Dwight sets up his plot to take his revenge, connecting the battery back to the engine and returning back home, a place it's apparent he hasn't been in a long time.

Where most revenge fantasies find their lead characters frighteningly proficient at stalking and murder, Dwight's plans fumble and falter from moment one.  Clean shaven, wearing stolen oversized business casual clothes, Dwight looks like a soft man, timid, bleary eyed, pudgy, completely unassuming.  He's not cut out for this sort of business, particularly when his target's family begins to hunt him down, and yet, he has no choice.  This is his drive, his mission.  His sister should be the one to talk sense in him, in any other film she would be admonishing him for what he's doing, angry abut how it impacts her life, and yet she's cautiously supportive.

I hesitate to call Blue Ruin a dark comedy, because it's a dead serious movie, and yet it's spin on the revenge tale is so fresh and about face that it's impossible not to laugh unconsciously in reaction to Dwight's failures and botched successes.  Dwight a fascinating character, burdoned by what he does and what he wants to do, but it's the only thing he has left in life to care about.  His time as a vagrant leaves him awkward in conversation, reserved... he keeps to himself, he doesn't make eye contact.  He seems to want nothing more than to slink back into that life of desperate solitude but he has his mission which he has to see through to the end.

Director Jeremy Saulnier tells his film in an extremely straightforward manner, and yet it's exactly the right touch.  There's no distraction, no flashy angles, unusual cuts, or any of the vast variety of tricks indie directors for so long following the Tarantino boom have used to try and distinguish themselves.  Saulnier instead relies upon holding shots, minimal cutting and letting scenes and actors breathe.  It's not as much about mounting tension, but about establishing the natural settings and normalicy that otherwise exists in this unconventional scenario.

Yeah, I'm remembering it well now, but it's certainly worth another watch.

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And finally for today (in actuality, I've been writing this column over a 5-day period), there's The Scribbler.  I first heard about this film via Bleeding Cool (a comic-book and nerd cinema-related website I write for) as they reported a graphic novel being released for the picture.  A couple days after this report I noticed that the film was on Netflix, so I figured why not give it a watch.  If it’s bad, I can turn it off.

It’s not a bad film, per se, but it’s far from great. It has the same sensibilities of The Crow, a highly stylized, dark and gritty quasi-supernatural/quasi-superhero-esque production, replete with whatever janky emo-style music is fueling the goth teenagers as they brood introspectively in their bedrooms.  Set in a facility that’s home to residents undergoing psychological rehabilitation (long and short term residents), it’s definitely not a Cuckoo’s Nest full-blown lock-down/caged-in situation but more of a half-way home.  But it’s dank.  Extremely so.  Remember that toilet stall Ewen MacGregor dove into to retrieve his suppository in Trainspotting?  Imagine that stall as an entire building.  Yeah, it’s gross.  The city this building resides in seems to be shrouded in perpetual night, or at least whenever it is day it’s like the sun nervously shines as the darkness threatens it’s habitual take over.  Also, rain and lightning seem almost a constant, for mood you see, except when it’s more convenient not to be raining.

Our protagonist, Suki (played by Katie Cassidy) is a young woman with multiple personality disorder who comes to the building recovering from her latest suicide attempt.  There she rekindles a friendship with Hogan (Garrett Dellahunt), a gearhead who pretends to be insane in order to live in the building on the cheap, sex up its desperate/vulnerable women, and liberate their drugs for his own profit.  She also befriends Cleo (Gina Gershon) a long-term resident, who shows her the ropes, including avoiding the stairs where a crazy naked girl likes to push people down them.

The film is so aggressively in your face about how edgy it’s trying to be.  It uses all the cinematic tricks of psychological thrillers and body horror films (oh, those shadows and neons), only never to any great terrifying or suspenseful effect, it’s strictly an aesthetic choice, like it wants to be a horror movie but the story doesn’t facilitate it. The sex scene between Suki and Hogan is kind of disgusting rather than titillating because of how it was shot, edited and soundtracked.  It’s like the film wants you to be repulsed by it because of the style choices it makes, but it’s only a slightly left-of-standard superhero origin story.  It realistically wants you to root for the title character as she comes to understand who she is and how her multiple personalities help her fulfill her true potential but it’s story is at cross purposes with its tone.

The acting in the film is quite good.  I liked everyone’s performances in it (including Michelle Trachtenberg as Suki’s nemesis, Michael Imperioli as her skeevy psychologist, and Eliza Dushku as the detective investigating the deaths in the building), they truly seem invested in their roles, so it’s unfortunate that the director’s vision (which seemed to be “let’s make a Cronenbergian superhero story but with a Zack Snyder pastiche”) clashed with everything else going on.  Honestly, I probably would have liked this in 1993, when comic-to-screen movies were rare, and rarely good, but we’ve moved well past that in the 20 years since. 


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Man, this took a long time and over 5000 words.  If I were concerned with page hits and visitors and any sort of monetary-earning angle to this site, I would’ve pushed each review out one-a-day. But even though they have no real connection to one another, beyond the fact that I’ve procrastinated in writing about them, they still feel like part of a whole and belong together in one fell swoop.  I’m rather impressed at my ability to recall how I felt about a film despite not entirely recalling the film (though as I write the specifics of the film tend to re-emerge).  I’m working from the top of the “to review” list with this one, but I may start at the bottom and work up from hereon out, get to the fresher stuff first instead of taking forever and having current releases wind up in yet another I Saw This!!