2023, James Mangold (Logan) - download
There are states in watching movies where I think I should probably just turn it off and pick up on another day. One is when I am falling asleep by 10pm and can no longer pay attention. That usually leads to moments where I just closed my eyes for seconds, but missed an important scene or character moment. Or just turning it off and giving up for another night. Another is when I am either annoyed going into it, a mood or something where I won't be entirely open to what I am watching. Its not a dislike for the movie in particular, but something likely extraneous which colours my viewing. I think I was with this one because from the opening CGI act I was just pissed off. The Uncanny Valley Ford was ... passable, but the more he was on the screen, the more annoyed I got. And then... the boredom hit me. Blah blah, punch nazis.... blah blah jump from one vehicle to another.... blah blah, run atop a train and dodge coming obstacles. Its stock Adventure Movie material, and I remember when that was more than enough for me, and often tropes I sought out. But for this movie... the boredom with the depiction just never went away.
I haven't watched the other Indie movies in quite some time, but there was a stage in my life when I jumped them into the same category as Star Wars or Alien. No matter what I thought of the movies individually, the franchise, especially the first, would always be dear to me. I was a huge devotee to the pair of TV series that spun-off that the Spielberg / Lucas movie started (Tales of the Gold Monkey and Bring Em Back Alive respectively), and I bought into a nostalgia that I was too young to actually subscribe to. But I can actively remember disliking the 2nd, and the 3rd and... well, not sure how I even have a fondness for the franchise but that nostalgic memory seems to win over reality.
At this point, I am just going to stop and do a ReWatch because I want to give a proper opinion, especially considering Kent's favourable writeup.
OK, the opening bit wasn't as annoying the second time around. I can actually see a bit of the adventure movie serial in the way it is shot, except for the bit running across the train. That just looks like badly done, unnecessarily CG. They could have just filmed someone running across a stationary train and fixed the rest in post.
But I get ahead of myself. The movie starts with a setup, sending us back to WWII, back to Indie (Harrison Ford, Cowboys & Aliens) Punching Nazis. Its 1944, the end of the war, a few years after the adventure with his dad. He's in ... the French Alps where Nazis are looting antiquities and he & Basil Shaw (Toby Jones, The Detectorists) are there to ... well, not sure. Recovery artifacts? Its not like they have a plan to foil an entire base of Nazis from absconding with their ill gotten gain. Let's assume Bas has convinced Indie to recover at least the Spear of Longinus (the spear that stabbed Christ in the side), always a source of mystical power to occultist types, before Hitler gets it. By this time he knows well that sometimes magical artifacts are... well, magical. Not a good thing for a mad ruler to get hold of. Good thing its a fake. No matter, Indie continues his hunt for it in one of the comic book series. Funny thing how the lance is also called the Spear of Destiny. Can never have too much destiny.
Anywayz, as this opening bit is a setup, the Lance is a distraction from the real artifact, the Antikythera, or Archimedes Dial. While nobody really says anything of interest, Bas is REALLY keen on it and there is already a scientist, physicist Dr. Voller (Mads Mikkelsen, Polar), on the train in search of it, and he even claims Hitler really should be more interested in that instead of the fake spear head. During the train running and Nazi punching, Dr. Voller catches a water spout to the face, and Indie & Bas have to jump off the train into a river. They lose the dial (more precisely, the half of the dial yet found).
BUT DID THEY?!? <insert melodramatic music - its an adventure serial, after all>
Now we dial it forward (grooooan), past the original movies & comic book adaptations, past the glass alien skull, all the way to 1969 with Dr. Henry Jones teaching bored students in NYC, Marion is divorcing him and he lives in a shitty apartment, drinking the rest of his life away. Anti-hero, much? Ducking out on his retirement party, he is approached by Helena "Wombat" Shaw (Phoebe Waller-Bridge, Solo: A Star Wars Story), the daughter of his late friend Bas. She resurrects the conversation about the Dial, which she claims the two men lost in the French Alps, but soon after, Indie suspects she always knew otherwise. You see, Indie always knew Bas was a wee bit too obsessed with it, so he hid it from the crazy little guy. But Helena also is not saying everything, as she is being pursued by (!!!) Dr. Voller, now called Schmidt, who works for the American Govt, one of those classic "forgiven Nazis" that helped with the rockets, that got men on the moon. His goons, along with some amoral CIA agents, give chase, after killing a few of Indie's college associates, framing him for the murder. Helena escapes, and so does Indie, aided by Grampa Sallah (John Rhys-Davies, Sliders), now a NYC cabbie.
This segment still does nothing for me. The overuse of a CG generated, overly complicated NYC celebrating the moon landing is distracting and .... overly complicated. There's a lot going on. And the running, jumping, chasing and horse riding in subways just... well, the yawns began here.
But again, he escapes with help from Sallah, fills in a bit of Wombat's recent history and decides to chase her to Tangier (or Tangiers; your choice) where she will be auctioning the half of the dial that Indie had tucked away for safe keeping. He never destroyed it like Bas asked ("fissures in time!!" which leads to a head canon thing -- basically Archimedes built a tool that identifies TARDIS energy and the fissures are just places/times where the Doctor has appeared). Also, she owes some Moroccan gangster for screwing over his son. It wouldn't be an Indiana Jones movie (as opposed to indie movie) without exotic locales, which is kind of why the romp in NYC felt off. Anywayz, Indie disrupts the auction, whip snaps a few people, does the requisite whip vs gun scene and Voller appears to steal the dial out from under everyone. And they off to the tuk tuk races !! Windings streets and alleys, chasing after Voller in his car, also being chased by the gangster in his car. Exciting! Daring! In a tuk tuk that must have been suped up by the same people that built the Fiat car Ethan Hunt uses in Dead Reckoning. Man, those tuk tuks can maneuver.
It was at this point I started having a bit more compassion for the Helena character. The first time round, she was just an annoying foil doing things for her own selfish reasons, not giving a bit of thought to whom she was hurting. But in this rewatch, I see some subtlety, hints of the loss she felt with her father's passing, and how Indie just disappeared from her life -- he just doesn't do family well. She may be selfish, but she's also loyal. There's a hint that she needs One Big Score so she and her kid sidekick Teddy (Ethann Isidore, Mortel) can retire to a calmer life. Meanwhile, Indie just wants to finally do right by Bas.
But Voller escapes with the dial piece and Bas's diaries. No matter, Wombat has them all memorized and has a strong theory as to where the next clue is -- something with a code on it, something lost to the ages. Its in a roman ship, where the original piece of the dial was found, but at the other end, a piece of the sunken vessel that fell off the shelf into deeper water. And Indie has just the help - Renaldo, an old Spanish diver with an old diving boat, now docked out of Greece.
Old is the keyword in this movie. Indie may have been The Guy in his day, but now he's waaaay past his prime. Despite being pretty ripped, albeit with saggy skin, he's in incredible shape for A Guy His Age. That has people, and viewers, judging him, but also underestimating him. Kind of. I mean, the viewer already sees him as a superhero taking bullets, snakes, stabbings and whatever is tossed his way, and getting away. But not without a scratch. Renaldo (Antonio Banderas, The 13th Warrior), the diver, is a reminder age catches up with everyone, and Indie is at the age where he is running out of Old Friends Who Help.
They dive, they get the artifact, but Voller is pretty smart, and has followed the same clues to the same location. But being a Nazi, he shoots most people and tries to extort Indie into translating the next clue. He won't, so they shoot Renaldo. Helena is not ready to sacrifice all for the integrity of the mission; she bargains for cold hard cash and does the translation. But, BUT, she has an ace card in her back pocket; ace card being a stick of dynamite. BOOM ! Zing! Dodge, they jump onto Voller's boat and make their escape.
We are beginning to see the weight of Indie's legacy. His friends are dying, and often for him or because of his endeavours. He's an adventurer who doesn't always account for the safety of others. So, in ways, not all that different from Helena. Yeah, I am enjoying the movie more in the second watching because I have done away with the spectacle, for the most part.
Next spectacle! You see, Helena misled Voller and she is off to the next clue -- the tomb of Archimedes -- via a gold tablet hidden inside the wax & wood of the deception clue. They think they are being sneaky leaving Voller and crew stranded on Renaldo's damaged boat, but he's a tenacious little Nazi. No sooner have Helena, Teddy and Indie arrived in Sicily than Voller shows up, taking Teddy captive. Not sure why; leverage? Kids are easier to manipulate? Either way, the pair rushes to the tomb and the Nazis give chase. We finally get some proper tomb raiding and make an interesting discovery. Not only does is the second piece of the dial in the tomb with Archimedes, but also there is a ... watch. And the frieze on his tomb has a phoenix with propellers. Hmmmm... time travel anyone? And then Voller shows up, shoots Indie, takes the stuff and off they go.
Finally, the end game is upon them. They dress up like proper Nazis, with a plan to fly into one of the time fissures that legend speaks of, and travel back to 1939. Not to support Hitler but to put him down, as Voller blames him for the fall of the Reich. And to put himself in power, of course, with all his knowledge of the future intact. I am sure he and his remaining goons have done some historical reading and know all the Allied troop movements, and such, and will win the war.
Meanwhile Helena and Teddy are giving chase, she on a motorcycle to climb on board, to stop them or save the wounded Indie or... who knows, but Dramatic Action! And Teddy is absconding with a small plane that he has learned to fly by talking to drunk American pilots in Morocco. Yep, that will work. Onboard Air Nazi Indie has an inspiration and points out a fatal flaw in the legends -- that Archimedes wouldn't have taken account for continental drift so his machine would not get the timey wimey stuff right. I mean, considering he had basically learned how to account for Time and Place via magical super-genius level understanding, I think he would have accounted for another force he didn't completely understand, but... whatever, things fuck up and they fly back to .... Ancient Times! Both planes are sucked through the cloudy vortex into the siege of Syracuse in 212 BC.
This was a battle where the "ancient super weapons of the ancients" came into play: claws that lifted ships out of the water and capsized them, sun powered heat rays that set ships on fire, etc. There is enough historical documentation to support the idea of these, but it does make me wonder if this was the beginning of science fiction in ancient times. Either way, we don't get to see these weapons in action (boooo!!!) but a few ballista shots take down the Nazi plane with Helena & Indie jumping out via parachute. The other plane lands safely, and Helena has to convince Indie to return to modern times with her, via a sock to the jaw. Despite all the weird shit that could happen with him staying in the past, he really really wants to end his career and life there. It would be long, as he does have a bullet wound but... no matter, sock pow, wake up in NYC (?!?!) for a nostalgic movie ending with Marion.
All in all, the adventure just doesn't do it for me. Sure, its exciting and well done, but.... yawn? At least, I was able to enjoy this viewing more by focusing on what little characterization there was but, still. I really makes me curious to go back and watch all the others to determine if I am just not in that mindset anymore, where this is My Jam. Or is it ... just not all that good? Each of the last few movies have had their Great Complaints and yet the nostalgia of the franchise survives. I guess time will tell, and I will return when the ReWatches commence.
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