Wednesday, July 22, 2020

3 Short Paragraphs: Fantasy Island

2020, Jeff Wadlow (Kick-Ass 2) -- download

Just like we have not seen a reboot of Love Boat, I am sure nobody wanted a reboot of the classic 70s/80s starring Ricardo Montalbán. And not just reboot / re-imagining, but a dark & gritty re-imagining. Marmy had the short lived idea to do a mini-binge of horror movies, sort of a Summer October During a Real Horror, but, have I mentioned a lack of attention span during this event? This was one of the few we did watch. P.S. Does anyone remember the even shorter lived previous reboot starring Malcom McDowell? P.S.S. Squirrel !!

As expected, Mr. Roarke (Michael Peña) runs the resort that claims to fulfill the fantasies of its guests, but under the direction that once they start it, they have to finish it. Arriving are Gwen (Maggie Q) seeking to revisit an old love affair, Melanie (Lucy Hale) who wants revenge on a childhood bully, JD and Brax Weaver (Ryan Hansen & Jimmy O Wang), brothers who want an unrepentant debaucherous weekend and finally, Patrick (Austin Stowell) who needs some reconnection with his dead dad. Initially things start off as expected, with the guests marveling at how detailed and real feeling these fantasies are, especially Melanie who gets to literally torture the girl from her past. But that doesn't stop her from pressing a few pain buttons or pulling a few levers, until she begins to realize that the girl strapped the chair is actually her nemesis, and breaks her out. Melanie senses something is very very wrong on Fantasy Island. Yeah, so do we. Cliche horror movie tropes attached to what was mostly a benign series.

Mostly. The original series, when hitting flagging ratings, did try all sorts of supernatural and horror-adjacent plot lines, even hinting loudly that Roarke was not your average human being. This movie sets up a dark centre to the island, one that generates the places & people needed for someone to go through with their fantasy, and seeking to take something in return. But that wasn't enough, for as our characters discover they are being manipulated, they decided another twist was required and derailed all the continuity of the movie. I won't spoil it for you, because you should be as disappointed as I was. Not even Peña, whose acting I always enjoy, could save this movie which was lackluster in so many ways.

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