Sense, Sensibility and Snowmen (2019, Hallmark)
The Story:
Dashworks is a Chicago party planning service run by the Dashwood sisters, recently inherited with mutual stake from their father. A massive charity gala is happening downtown, and sister 1 (Ella) wants to submit a proposal and try growing the business, while sister 2 (Marianne) wants to keep the business small. Marianne has just gone through a breakup.
Meanwhile, Ferris Wheel Toys is about to land distribution through a major European retail chain owned by the Laurents. Edward Ferris, son of the owner and new-ish CEO, is really unsure about their future if this doesn't happen. The board is counting on him to make it happen.
Ella is waiting in their father's lawyer's lobby, staring at a piece of art. Edward walks down the stair, notices the pretty woman, makes comment about the art being garbage, and they have a pained exchange. Eddy-baby tries to reset and try his pick-up charm again, but it falls even flatter.
Eddy baby is the cover story on the local magazine (Chicago Weekly), but the story is less than kind about the direction of Ferris Wheel Toys' business. The magazine is out just as the Laurents arrive, with magazine in hand and awful French accents on their tongue. Eddybaby is letting the pressure get to him and promises them more than he can deliver, including a big gala Xmas party. Guess whose party planning service they will be using?
Edbabe kinda sucks at his job. But as we see Dashworks in action with their latest party, it turns out that Ella also kind of sucks at her job.
Ella's drowning her bad job sorrows at a local bar when she overhears Edward's conversation with his cousin Brendan that he needs a party planner and they're all booked. Not realizing it's the doink she met the other day, she storms over, only to regret it immediately. But, turns out Chicago is a small town and Brendan is her dad's lawyer, who helps bridge the gap between the two as they both choke down their mutual disdain.
But Marianne informs Ella that a large 100-person party in 9 days is
Meanwhile, cousin Brendan comes to Dashworks to drop off papers and to have clumsy and awkward exchanges with Marianne. The clumsy and awkward is reciprocated.
While looking at the venue, Ella and Eddybaby have some background chats talking about how they love the jobs they do, avoiding the fact that they're both not so great at them. Edbabe has Ella pegged as a flighty, artsy type, while she has him pegged as a dull square. The fact that he doesn't celebrate Christmas, but instead finds "the season is about completing a statistical review of [his] year". What a dud. "No glitter, one color" he says for the party.
At a Christmas Market, Brendan and Edward meet Marianne and Ella. Brendan is entertaining the faux-Francophones, but asks quizzically "what do people do here". Ella has to educate him on what "merriment" and "fun" is. He's clearly not the right guy to be running a toy company. But with Ella at his side, they start winning over the Laurents (who are just eating this festive crap up). A couple of meet-ups and Ella and Eddy baby are starting to get comfortable with each other's differences. He's showing her how to be serious about business, while she's showing him how to enjoy ...well...life (but more specifically, Christmas). They're Paula Abdul and MC Skat Cat, you know, opposites attract.
Complication, Eddybaby's VP, Lucy, is an ex of his. She drops a bomb about them attending prom together years ago, and of course Ella's going to have the wrong idea.
Edbabe is hosting the Laurents for dinner and knows he needs to build a relationship, and his personality isn't his strong suit, so he invites Ella, offering to pay her for her services as a personable, cheery person and festive decorating skill. Edward's place is massive, but bland. White walls, grey furniture, no decor to speak of. Decorating highjinks and post decorating getting-to-know-you-better conversations ensue... where we find out that Ferris Wheel Toys doesn't have kids playtest their designs. Erm, what? No wonder business is on the cusp of collapsing.
Meanwhile, lawyer Brendan asks sister Marianne out on a date. Really complicated sub-plot happening here.
Brandon's firm is hosting a children's Christmas party, and for some reason Ella is taking Edward's personal assistant's son to it. Not sure I get how that happened. Eddy-baby donated the toys for the party and wants to tag along to conduct impromptu market research, followed by snowman making and the requisite adults having a snowball fight leaving the kids out of it. Later dinner with the Laurents goes smashingly thanks to Ella.
Marianne finds an invitation to a scriptwriting seminar in New York that Ella has already turned down and gets the wrong idea about her transient sister. But even when it's clarified, Marianne isn't sold, and Ella gets pissed. She lets out her steam on a work/shopping date with Eddy baby. He suggests she puts together a business plan to prove to Marianne how serious she is, and later she asks him for help. Turns out he's already put it together. Then he shows Ella that he's established a focus group space for kids to play with their toys. Their very generic toys. Airplanes, stick ponies, stuffed animals, balls. Oy. But Edbabe's dad stops by and is unimpressed. Ella reminds Edwardthat he is not his dad and doesn't need to run by his playbook.
Eddy-baby tries to bridge the rift between Ella and Marianne by arranging a gingerbread house-making double date. Cue the montage. But, oh no, after a triumphant winning gingerbread house, they find out the venue for Ferris Wheel Toys' party fell through. But through Ella's diligent efforts and creative solution, she proves to Marianne her commitment. They reconcile. Meanwhile, Edward stands up to his dad, has eggnog and plans to spend the holidays together, ledger-free. Edward and Ella take the Laurents on a carriage ride, and Edward gives Ella a new Ferris bear prototype and a snowflake necklace.
At the big party, which Ella makes a fabulous "Winter Wonderland" affair, the Laurents agree to carry Ferris Wheel Toys in all their stores. With 15 minutes left to go... everything seems to be perfect, but what can go wrong? OH, Lucy. But they're just friends. And Ella misunderstands a hug. Ugh. But Eddy baby needs to give his big speech and he can't explain or chase after her. Ugh.
Ugh.
Christmas day, Ella has a happy morning with Marianne, and Eddybaby has a good time with his parents. Brendan stops by before he goes to Marianne's and fills Edbabe in on the misunderstanding which leads to, ugh, awkwardness, then, ugh a Christmas reunion.
The Draw:
The Nine Lives of Christmas is still my favourite Hallmark movie, mostly thanks to the charms of Brandon Routh, but in no small part due to Kimberly Sustad's affably goofy charm. I've suffered through enough Hallmarks featuring Full House and other former child stars, I want to see Christmas romance movies featuring actresses (and actors) I actually like. Sustad is one of those I would like to see more of. Too bad she's not the lead here.
The Formulae:
All of it. It's all formula. Failing business (x2), people who need to learn lessons, party planning, snowball fights (though fake snow never makes good snowballs) and snowman making, dead parents for the people who love Christmas, unhappy relationships with parents for people who don't, juvenile "does he/she like me???" approach to dating, stupid misunderstandings (ugh!), a big promotion/contract to close before Christmas, and so much more.
Unformulae:
Nothing. Nothing feels out of formula in this one.
True Calling?
Jane Austen's Sense and Sensibility features characters named Elinore (so, Ella?) and Marianne, the Dashwood sisters (there were actually 3 of them in Austen's novel), there's also a Colonel Brandon and an Edward Ferrars. So vague, vague, vague connections (not unlike Pride, Prejudice and Mistletoe)
The Rewind:
The magazine cover... "Chicago Weekly" with the golden seal exclaiming "CEO EDITION". Uh, okay. Is it an edition about CEOs? For CEOs? By CEOs? Who's the target for this edition, exactly? I'd think this was a mass media local publication trying to reach its largest audience...shouldn't they have something more like "Chicago's Power 100" or something?
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| This is supposed to be a professional magazine...look at those shadows under Edward's nose...terrible |
The Regulars:
Ella is played by Erin Krakow, a Hallmark regular including the lead performer of When Calls the Heart and Finding/Engaging/Marrying Father Christmas trilogy (egad). She's got these types of performances on lock, with effortless charm. But she's meant to be a bit flighty and unreliable, and she never conveys that very well... instead we just get the sense that Marianne is being to hard on her.
Eddy-baby is played by Luke McFarlane (Killjoys) and he is no stranger to these things either. He's supposed to be uptight and rational in counterpoint to Erin's flighty and artsy, but just like Krakow, McFarlane doesn't convey it all that well. His voice (which sounds perfect for commercial voice overs or doing animated work when Ed Helms isn't available) always has a hint of playfulness to it, when it's supposed to sound more automaton. Unconvincing.
Poor Kimberly Sustad. When is she going to get back in the Hallmark limelight? These supporting, almost forgotten roles are wasted on her. (Oh, she was the lead in last year's A Godwink Christmas... she should be in one every year!) Her and Jason McKinnan as Brandon had almost nothing to do in this story and their romance was pretty much:
B- "hey, here's some papers"
M- "oh thanks, I love you"
B- "me too"
M- "we're a couple now"
Anna Van Hoof plays such a bit role of Lucy that you barely notice she's there. Per IMDB, she seems to be an up-and-comer for Hallmark. She might get the leading lady bump in about 2 years. I think she'll be in more prominent secondary roles next year.
Peripheral players, like Anesha Bailey and Shiraine Haas have multiple appearances in Hallmark as minor(ity) supporting characters and represent a very 90's view of representation in these things. Do better by these actors Hallmark.
How does it Hallmark?
I was beginning to worry that I had Hallmark Stockholm Syndrome as I'd been so effusively praising the last batch of these I watched. But this one smacked me upside the head and reminded me how mediocre-to-awful these things generally are. Sure the leads are charming enough but doing nothing at all we haven't seen before in a story that features nothing we haven't seen before. It's not entirely unwatchable, but rote to the point of tiresome.
How does it movie?
Nope, not even close.
Eddy-Baby. #snort
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