I Saw This (double exclamation point) is our feature wherein Kent(!) or Toasty attempt to write about a bunch of stuff they watched some time ago and meant to write about but just never got around to doing so. But we can't not write cuz that would be bad, very bad. Freedumb Convoy bad.
What I Have Been (or Am) Watching is the admitted state of me spending too much time in front of the TV. But what else was the last few years about? Sure, we got a few breaks from being confined at home, and might have actually gone outside (gasp!) and socialized with (double-gasp!) human beings (faint-dead-away) but we always ended up back on the sofa, flicker in hand, trying to find something to watch amidst the 35 shows we downloaded, and the 5 or so streaming services we are subscribed to.
Part A is here. Part B is here. Part C is here. Part D is over there. Part E is there. Part F hides over there.
So this is what I am watching right now, or maybe only watched one episode and am waffling about continuing or maybe I even am taking my time with it. This will be a lot, so shorter than usual. Or maybe not. I am a decisive/divisive writer.
Picard S02, 2022, Paramount+
OK, I am
back to being utterly annoyed by Picard being an android again -- primarily because THIS season seems to forget it every ten seconds. Perhaps they are making a very bad rendition of the old "if you replace every part of a ship, is it still the original ship" adage, but I am not sure I would consider Picard still human. Sure, he is still
Picard but I don't think I would classify him as human.
ANYWAYZ, this season picks up a few years after the events of the first season, and doubles down on the nostalgic references, by adding in the Borg and Q, and a boat load of time travel, which references the whale movie. Again, I am all in for the nostalgia, but this season is just leaving me almost as flat as this season of Discovery did. I just want it to have some... weight.
** If I had footnotes in this blogging software, I would add in a footnote about the nostalgic bit with the return of "the punk on the bus" from The Voyage Home. Seriously, that was some gold level nostalgia !
So, Picard (Patrick Stewart, The Green Room) is visited by Q (John de Lancie, Torchwood), who has something going on. But Q being Q, he fucks with Picard by altering the past which causes the present to be altered to not much better than the Mirror Universe, or... maybe worse? But for some unknown reason, Picard and the cast of the first season, sans Data's Daughter, still remember the original timeline. So, they decide the best way to fix it, since Q isn't around providing his usual goading hints, is to go into the past using a handy nearby Borg Queen (insert Locutus PTSD; Annie Wersching, Runaways) and perform the sling-shot effect from the Kirk maneuvers handbook.
I am just not invested in this season, but rarely was I entirely in the three next-gen series either. Oh, sure I watched them every week (but for that gap with DS9 when I Didn't Have TV), but I didn't really care one way or the other, whether it was good or not. This time round, I really do wish it was ... better. I mean, there are just no real stakes here. We know they will repair the timeline, we know they will recover The Borg in Red, we know they will solve whatever Q's puzzle is and maybe even help him. So, its just going through the nostalgia with familiar faces. Maybe they are playing with the tweaks of the Universe again, setting up head canon reasons for why Discovery and coming Strange New Worlds looks so different than original series, but I doubt it.
Still, I will continue watching.
The Wheel of Time, 2022, AmazonPrime
Meanwhile, I will eventually go back and finish this first season, but entirely as expected, the adaptation of the third in the
Lord of the Rings clones from way back in the BFF (big fat fantasy) era of paperbacks, Robert Jordon's
Wheel of Time series, is just not that good. Fantasy TV rarely is. People, including me, were hoping that
Game of Thrones would change that up, as so much fantasy TV ends up looking like everything is set in the
Hercules /
Xena world. And this one did.
Without going back and re-reading plot synopses, I will relate the handful of episodes from I watched, from memory. A bunch of youngsters (insert [someone else's] complaint about woke TV and skin tones) in a remote mountain village have their lives upset when the place is attacked by legendary monsters; no not orcs, but horn-headed, beast-legged manimals, called Trollocs. Everyone dies but them, and they escape with the help of a witchy-cleric lady (Rosamund Pike, Gone Girl) who represents a repressive cabal of ... well, magic users. She believes one of the kids is likely the reincarnation of a BBEG who was defeated in ancient times, but destined to return. Rather than kill them all, like everyone else suggests, she secrets them away.
This is all supposed to represent a Fellowship analog with the escaping characters going from A to B with bad guys chasing them. But typical of fantasy TV, its more about the moaning and groaning of youngsters with issues, than it is about the fantasy trappings. I was not enthralled, but might go back and see how they round out the season. Luckily, I only read a handful of the original books, and forget EVERYTHING about them, so I am not burdened with Bad Adaptation woes.
The Good Lord Bird, 2020, Showtime
I meant to download this during The Pause, as I had seen the trailers and loved how wacky Ethan Hawke was. He plays American abolitionist John Brown during the Bleeding Kansas period of history, when violence happened between pro-slavery and anti-slavery groups, just as Kansas became a proper US state. The show is seen through the eyes of Henry Shackleford (Joshua Caleb Johnson,
Snowfall), a slave who Brown frees, and who Brown mistakes for a girl, and puts them in a dress. Henry sees some benefit in the belief and doesn't argue, but ends up in Brown's ragtag group of "freedom fighters", and sees first-hand exactly how utterly insane Brown is.
I have watched a few episodes, and I am just not sure. Hawke's antics are hilarious, disturbing and discomforting but I am not sure where the show will go beyond just being a weird-west slice of period life. Which, being a mini-series instead of just a S01, means that could be enough.
The Endgame, 2022, NBC
Yeah yeah, Morena Baccarin peacocking around haughty as fuck (all the puns intended) is the only reason I even attempted to watch this show. It's pretty much a rip-off of
The Blacklist with James Spader, in that a notorious criminal mastermind allows themselves to be captured only to toy with the authorities, doing some stuff that benefits said authorities, while still masterminding a ton of illegal shit in the background that benefits ONLY themselves.
But, for one, her pseudo accent is just terrible and annoying AF. And secondly, all the supporting cast is unknown and incredibly low-grade choices, leaving it all feeling like something that was sitting on a shelf, that was taken down and dusted off when they had nothing else better to release.
Upload S02, 2022, AmazonPrime
Loved season one. Or rather
liked a lot ? Anywayz, I came into S2 with lots of anticipation and ... only watched one episode. Not sure why, but we return to the show with the (not) Evil GF having uploaded herself (but not really) to be with Nathan (Robbie Amell,
The Flash), while Nora (Andy Allo,
Chicago Fire) has gone off the grid, because Nathan disappeared. He didn't actually, just was just had his funds cut off, so he ended up "in the basement" (remember, its all a virtual world, so basement is a ... metaphor?), frozen and unavailable. Nora is worried about the conspiracy that actually led to Nathan's death, so she goes off the grid for a month or so, while Nathan's funds build back up.
There is no reason I have not continued watching other than... squirrel ! Yeah, easily distracted.
Halo, 2022, Paramount+
Video game adaptations don't exactly have the best reputation. And
Halo the game is more known for its multi-player editions than the single player bit with the actual story, yet for some reason, this series was greenlit and actually given a budget. I knew I would watch it, just because, but lo and behold, was I surprised when it was actually
good !
This is not a retelling of any plots from any of the games, but more world building and a story inspired by the plots from the games, primarily the discovery of the titular "dyson ring" called the Halo. In the initial few episodes we are introduced to the (somewhat oppressive) star faring human culture called UNSC (United Nations Space Command), the alien race they are at war with called The Covenant, and the human insurrectionists holding out against the UNSC. And, of course, the special force of soldiers within the UNSC called the Spartans, led by John-117 or "Master Chief" (Pablo Schreiber, American Gods).
Marmy pointed out that only in the first episode do we see much action, as the Spartans drop down on insurrectionist planet Madrigal, just as the community is being wiped out by Covenant soldiers. In the aftermath, a lone teenage survivor (Yerin Ha, Reef Break) is taken by the Spartans, but not before they discover an alien artifact that gives John visions of a past he doesn't remember.
The rest of episodes have been about Dr. Halsey, the creator of the Spartans (Natascha McElhone, Calfornication), manipulating John and his connection to the alien artifact, while John learns to become more than the unquestioning super soldier he has been up to, until he touched the artifact. Given who is playing Master Chief, that he spends most of his time with his helmet off is not surprising. But given the rather slow progression of the plot, and the lack of action (in a series based on an entirely combat driven game), I am surprised it has me so captured. But the production values are high, the directing tight and the acting is pretty good considering the source; after all these years we still don't expect much from specfic TV.
Troppo, 2022, ABC Television
Crime TV. We go seeking it out, usually not finding much good, but occasionally hitting a gem.
Troppo comes to us from Australia, and to be honest, it only caught my attention because Thomas Jane is in it, and as a grizzled detective. Not sure how he can be already typecast in my mind, because of his role on
The Expanse, but here we are.
Ted Koncaffey is an American living in Australia, estranged from his family after being accused of sexually assaulting a teenage girl. He was exonerated, but only because of a mix-up in procedure. He is hiding out in Far North Queensland, a rather rural, tropical place, when he is dragged into an investigation of the death of a Korean businessman, by local pariah turned private detective Amanda Pharrell (Nicole Chamoun, The Gloaming). In her teens she was accused & convicted of murder, and has only recently been released, living an angry, counter-culture life while dealing with many.... personal issues.
I was hoping more for Murder of the Week, but the ongoing tale is a rather classic British-style deep & dark murder investigation which, of course, has tendrils reaching into all parts of the isolated community.
P.S. As the show didn't want us rooting for a possible pedophile, they clear that question up pretty quickly as a medical examiner points out that the physical evidence in the case did not point to Koncaffey, therefore he must have investigated a far too sensitive suspect, leading to his frameup.
Amusingly, I recognized an actress playing the daughter of the murdered Korean businessman as the survivor of the insurrectionist colony attack in Halo.
Outer Range, 2022, AmazonPrime
Only one episode into this one. Not sure yet. My post-
Longmire cowboy, open range (not a pun) obsession continues with this weird-west tale of a family dealing with a missing wife / daughter, a ruthless neighbour seeking to take their land, and... well, a big science-defying hole in their outer range that only the head of their family has found so far.
This slightly smacks of Benson-Moorhead style story, but... I just don't know yet. Time will (possibly) tell, but the acting and production values are tight and appropriately eerie. I suspect it will get more fuck-with-your-head as time goes on, and that usually keeps my attention... for a while. I hope it will have some real answers by the time the seasons gets to closing.
But can I really go wrong with Josh Brolin?
Sweet Home, 2020, Netflix
I probably could combine a bunch of single episodes of Japanese/Korean horror/thriller shows into one paragraph, but I actually watched more than a handful of this one, so it gets the post. Netflix is full of these shows, and after the popularity of
Squid Game (one of the single-episoders) I am not surprised, but they were there before, and they will keep appearing long after we forget that one success happened.
Cha Hyun-soo (Song Kang, Nevertheless) moves into an incredibly squalid apartment building after something tragic happens at home; after which I got the idea he tried to commit suicide, but failed. Not long after, people begin changing into monsters, and the government announces that people should barricade themselves inside their homes. Most of the residents of the apartment building, after a bunch change and kill others, gather on the main floor for survival. Hyun-soo is infected/cursed but seems to be able to retain his humanity, and becomes the contentious protector of the survivors as they turn on each other in the chaos.
The monsters are fun, the action is gorey and the characters are varied enough to be interesting, but the traditional method of dragging things out for far too long diminished my interest rather quickly.
Moon Knight, 2022, Disney+
OK, why don't I like this latest of the MCU series? Or more accurately, why is it not doing anything for me? I don't dislike it, and I am watching each episode each week, but I spend as much time watching my phone as I do watching the episode. Marvel Fatigue? Not a character I care about? Dislike for Oscar Isaac? None of the above. The only thing that stands out is how irritating I find his faux British accent when he is Steven, but nothing else really comes to mind as to
why I am not fully on board.
So, Steven Grant (Oscar Isaac, ExMachina) is a gift shop attendant at the British Museum with more than a passing obsession with all things Egyptian, much to the annoyance of his boss. But he keeps on losing time, and showing up in weird places, while also doing his best to chain himself to his bed. You see, Steven has Marc Spector (Oscar Isaac, Dune), soldier of fortune inside his head (body?) and Spector is also the avatar of Khonshu, Egyptian god of the moon. As Moon Knight, he is trying to stop the previous avatar Harrow (Ethan Hawke, The Northman) from bring back another Egyptian god Ammit.
The action is well done, the effects impressive and the balance between tension and comedy is OK, but I am just ... not into it. The Benson-Moorhead episode did a bit more to keep my attention, but beyond that... yawn. Still, I will see it through.
Joe Pickett, 2021, Spectrum
Yeah, this one was more about trying to find another
Longmire. Another rural America crime show this time set in Wyoming with Pickett (Michael Dorman,
For All Mankind) as the new game warden in a small rural town dealing with red neck poachers and the people who don't want to remember the last game warden has retired. And also, he has a dark past, because they always do.
Its going to be another full-season story arc kind of show, but nothing about the first episode caught my attention, beyond getting a sense of deja vu from the video game Far Cry 5. Still, pretty mountains and open fields?
Meh.
From, 2022, Epix
Now, THIS one has my attention!
This is a horror-scifi thriller series where a rural horror road (that one in all the horror movies that is shot from above, winding its way through the trees) leads to that pocket dimension town, like the one from that episode of Fringe. You drive in one side of the town, drive out, but end up coming back in the other side, in an endless loop. You cannot leave town.
People have been living in this town for .. a long time, doing as best they can. But that's not all. Every night monsters come out of the woods, monsters that to all appearances are eerie 1960s small town American inhabitants, until they catch you. Then they revert to vampire monsters and eat you. The entire town hides indoors at night, protected by strange stone talismans hanging near doors, behind closed curtains, as the monsters do their best to siren song you into opening windows or doors, letting them in. Once you do, you are dead.
New Family arrives, after being driven off the road by a pair of tech moguls, who get caught up in the loop. New Family learns the ropes quick enough as their kid gets trapped inside the RV and the town sheriff (Harold Perrineau, The Rookie) has to bring a talisman and protect the family until they can free the kid, the next morning. And then they are welcomed back into town, to learn the whole story.
But beyond the absolute horror of what is going on, there is also an incredibly complex and mysterious ... something else going on. Where does food come from? They grow some, but apparently just beyond the town borders, animals appear in the woods, as they are needed. There is electricity and running water, but... from where? New Family Dad (Eion Bailey, Band of Brothers) finds out quick enough that none of the wiring (you know, in walls or extension cords) has any actual wires -- its all just rubber plugged into outlets yet still providing light and power. Where did the talismans come from? Who is the strange man who turns out to be the very first survivor of the town back in the 60s? What are the Far Away Trees? Who is talking to the psycho girl? Much of the show is about WTF is Going On? And that has me enthralled.
And it is also incredibly horrific. Not scary, but monstrous and horrible, as soon after the New Family arrives, the tentative peace the town had for a while (weeks? months?) disappears and people keep dying in thinly connected events -- the town drunk forgets to go home in time, and his daughter opens a window, the girl working in the diner hears voices and kills one of the tech moguls, but also opens the door to the clinic letting the monsters in to kill the old man with dementia, and the hippy commune house on the hill has a particularly bad night after one man is "seduced" by a single monster/siren. Things are getting worse after New Family has arrived, but threads are being unraveled, that may lead to the town's rescue or... get worse? I have no idea, and that is what has my attention.
I also like that I recognized the old, run down structures of the town, more the style of architecture, and found out it was being shot on location outside of Halifax, NS. I also reallllly liked watching Maritime comedian Shaun Majumder (This Hour Has 22 Minutes) showing his dramatic chops playing the town priest.
That reminds me, I have to download another episode.
The Outlaws, 2022, AmazonPrime
Only one episode in. This is a British series created by and starring Stephen Merchant. The premise is simple enough -- a disparate bunch of people are gathered together to fulfill their community service sentence by cleaning up a rec centre. They are all ages, all levels of crime, but all stuck together working under a clipboard Napoleon. The trailer tells us they find a mysterious bag of money and the season will come from them deciding what to do with it, but the first episode tells us exactly where the money comes from, and the story is that much more complex for it.
The characters are fun, and not black & white at all, which will work to the show's benefit. People are assholes but nobody is a "bad guy" yet. Yet. And Merchant, as writer, director and star, is his usual quirky, weird but basically nice guy who I suspect will get darker as time goes on.
