3 Short Paragraphs: Jack the Giant Slayer

2013, Bryan Singer (X-Men, Superman Returns) -- download

How do I change these "reviews" up? They never ended up what they started as, the premise of Graig and I arguing or disagreeing about movies or TV, in a back and forth single post nature. They evolved, into Graig doing proper long format reviews and I doing hackneyed attempts at summations. But really, if anything I did want each entry to be more blog post than true review of the movie. Thus, whenever possible I tend to bypass the staples that all "how to write reviews" demand, but they usually weave their way in. I don't know what purpose all this is supposed to serve, whether it is evolving into "proper writing" or not, but I continue. And occasionally the review is less about the movie than about me writing about the movie; like now.

But seriously, either I cut some movies out of the entire mix, which I loathe to do, or I am left saying only, "Well, I liked that one."  Sometimes that is all there is to say about a movie. "I enjoyed it." Often, the more frustrating a movie is, the more there is to say about it. I suppose that would apply to loving the movie as well, considering how much I went on about Pacfic Rim. So, I enjoyed Jack the Giant Slayer. The giants look great, the supporting cast (Stanley Tucci, Ewan MacGregor, Bill Nighy) are incredibly entertaining. The story is feasible and the mains are likable. It looks great. But that is all the passion I have to say about it.

What is it about? If you do not know the plot of the faery tale, basically Jack gets conned into taking beans instead of coin while selling the horse in town. The beans are magical and when they get planted, they grow into a great big ol beanstalk that reaches up high into the land of the giants. In this one, angsty leather hoodie wearing Nicholas Hoult (previous the zombie) has to go with the heroes into the giants' realm and rescue the princess. But Tucci the traitor leads the giants back and there is a rousing battle between the people and the CGI until Jack recovers the magic giant-controlling crown and wins the day. That's it. Its passable D&D-ish fantasy fare with some great acting and incredibly well done digital giants. Honestly, I would have been more intrigued if they had gone all CW and set it in modern times, lending more credence to Jack as the heroic hoodie-wearing rundown youth, with the giants attacking New York instead of fantasy England née Cloister.