31 Days of Horror: Orcs!

2011, James MacPherson -- download

Oh for the love of the genre, I don't even remember where I bumped into this, inspiring me to download what I thought was a send-up on slasher films but using some bad makeup monsters that can only be described as orcs.  In my head, it even lent itself to the D&D conversation where you relate that even the least dangerous monster could be the protagonist of a horror movie.  I expected some campy, gory fun that I could laugh at.  Yeah, ahem.

Unfortunately that is all the director expected as well so they did a bad farce of the campers being killed by monsters in the dark along with ... well, too many fucking stupid references to Lord of the Rings and a few from Aliens just for the fun of it.  This movie literally must have been born of a napkin treatment where the owners of a bunch of orc costumes tried to come up with something to do with them, "Let's make a movie!!"  I would kick the person who laughed hilariously when they made the connection, "Get it, they're PARK rangers fighting orcs!!"

It's only horror in that it borrows the convention. I apologize for including this in the lot but it was the choice of the night.  Next up we actually watch a few from our own collection.  Then back to Netflix or the local DVD store... if I can find one in our neighbourhood anymore.